Waking of Saturday, January 26, 2019 ~ 2
This had been a long time coming.
I warped to the Dueling Peaks, took
out Knight from the Stable, and rode him to Hateno. Saving a few people along
the way, of course.... I swear, that
stretch of road....
I made it to Hateno, and found
Bolson and his crew. Still sitting out by that wok beside the old empty house.
....
Hateno was one of the first places
I had visited; Bolson was an early snake in my life. But now I had traveled the
world, or at least the country, and seen just about every habitation there was
to see.... just on the vague off chance there might be.... someone else making
a similar offer.... somewhere.... Though in my heart as time went on.... I
think I had known.... there wouldn’t be.
The Deku Tree’s Navel was homely
enough, and Pepp was kind to keep a bed there just for me. But.... I was no
Korok....
And
these Champions’ weapons....
And Hateno still left a dreary,
unloving taste in my mouth.
But....
....
It was time.
I had seen the world, and it was
time.
I approached Bolson, and I finished
what I had started so long ago, and I bought
the house. I shelled out the three thousand rupees. I had seen that amount
come and go and come again in my purse, but now.... I was finally putting it
where I’d meant to put it eventually.
I bought the house.
And Bolson was.... taken aback! By
me, spending so much at such an age! He just found it so.... studly.
Lol Bolson is so gay.
And so the house was mine. As was a
weapon mount Bolson and crew had left
in there that didn’t get sold. “Consider it a housewarming gift,” Bolson said.
A weapon mount.... Hmmm....
I thought I’d seen those in David’s Hateno House....
After the transaction, it was
decided that Hudson, one of Bolson’s men, was going to Akkala. Bolson Construction
was expanding.
Well that was sudden. :c
I said goodbye to him and bade him
good luck.... and he told me to take care of myself.... Nice guy, Hudson. I
always liked him.... when I spoke to him. He was always the most cordial.
He even had his own little....
music.... some gentle musical theme.... as he walked off and away into the
fade-out.
Aww. :( I’d miss that guy.
Hahhhh.
....
But for NOW....
....
I WENT TO CHECK OUT MY HAUS.
....
I ran inside and it was so bare.
But it was mine.
“This is my house,” I said to
David.
The wooden floors gaped dustily up at
me as I pounded around in the silence.
“This is my house,” I said again.
“....”
“THIS.... IS MY HOUSE. THIS IS MY HOUSE!” I started singing. XD
And David actually recognized it
and rolled his eyes hard.
“WON’T YOU GET OUT OF MY HOUSE?
THIS IS.... THIS IS MY.... HOUSE
THISISMY HOUSE.... WON’T YOU GET OUT OF MY HOUSE—I’LL GIVE YOU.... A GOOD
SPELL, FOR YOU TO USE. SO YOU CAN
JUMP ON MY ROOFS AND EVERYTHING LIKE THAT. THIS IS MY HOUSE. PLEASE, GET OUT OF
MY HOUSE, IT’S—NOT YOUR HOUSE. I’VE GOT A BIG BEARD! Out of my
house.... out.... Ah, don’t stab me....”
....
I don’t think I actually sang the
whole thing for/at David but I sure as heck ain’t gonna leave it out of the
log.
I ran happily around my new house a
few more times, up to the loft and down again, around and around before the
initial excitement wore down pretty hard.
Um, the house was all bare. It
didn’t even have a door.
I’d finally mounted Mipha’s spear
up on the wall, and that was something,
but.... where was everything else?
David’s house was much fuller than this....
I ran out the doorway to look for
Bolson again, getting halfway across the little bridge before stopping and.... hmmmm turning back and grabbing Mipha’s
spear again; I didn’t like leaving it alone in a house with no door.
I ran to go find Bolson, but the evening
was falling fast and I didn’t find him.
But I did find Kilton.
!
And I remembered.
Now that I’d beaten another Divine
Beast....
He
should have something new!
Now I could finally see whatever it
was that David had seen.... I had guessed and guessed that time, hoping for
answers just as much as not. Was it a Hinox Mask? A Guardian Mask? Some kind of Malice-Immunity Potion? But David never
said....
I approached the little man in his
balloon now....
Kilton was very excited. He’d
outdone himself this time. He had created the ultimate monster gear. “I’m
actually a bit terrified of myself right now,” he said.
Oh
my gosh WHAT IS IT?
He called it.... the dark series.
What?
And he said when I put on this
ultimate monster camouflage, I might just become a monster myself. “Have fun
being hunted for your organs,” he tells me.
WHAT?
He also said that I might find
myself able to move faster at night. “Not sure how that worked out,” he says, “but....”
He trailed off.
Oh
my gosh....
WHAT IS IT, KILTON?
I clicked through his dialogue
until he finally finished his spiel, and I got into his items. Scrolled
down.... down.... down....
And....
OH MY GOSH IT WAS A DARK LINK
OUTFIT.
Dark
Link!
And I studied it a bit more.... “OH
MY GOSH THOSE ARE OOT’S BRACERS!” I
said to David.
“Who’s Oot?”
“This is OoT’s outfit!”
“Who’s Oot?”
“Ocarina of Time.”
“Oh.”
I knew them by the broad banding over the forearms, and the
boot-flaps, and the tunic-lapels, and the shaping of the bandolier and the broadness
of the belt.
OoT!
Kilton said he’d designed these
with a monster born of shadow in mind.
Uh
muh gush....
What an enormous upwelling of
nostalgia.
So I started trading him monster
bits for his Mon currency. Fortunately I had over 400 Lizalfos Talons and
Chuchu Jellies, over 300 Bokoblin Fangs and plenty
of Ancient Screws and things.... I made exactly as much as I needed: 3,997 Mon.
And I bought the Dark Tunic for 999
mon.
And I bought the Dark Trousers for
999 mon.
And finally.... I bought the Dark
Hood for 1,999 mon.
And I put them all on and....
Oh....
My
gosh....
Well that was right creepy.
I
was Dark Link!
....
I
swear he bore his teeth more.... when he wore this Dark Series....
So I ran to find some townsfolk to
scare. But they only jumped and cowered and then spoke to me normally.
And
I finally found Bolson! Inside one of the houses in the morning just before he
woke up. I just had to wait a minute because he couldn’t be bothered until he
got back to the Hylian home.
And shortly, but not shortly
enough.... he did. And I spoke to him. And he could see that I was looking at
him like I was displeased, or wanted him to keep working on the house—because I
did.
So he said he’d finish making it a
real home for 5,000 rupees.
You
sneakthief!
“But for you, we’ll just start at
100.”
Uh
huh, of course you will....
So I spent that morning having him
build me things. First, a door, for one hundred rupees.
I forked over the cash, and he
called Karson, and in the ensuing blackout I was happily amused to hear that it
sounded like the two of them SERIOUSLY got to work! With much manly grunting
and huffing and puffing and yelling and guttural shouts all to the rhythm of
the sounds of manual construction! XD And when the scenery faded back in, my
house had a brand new door. Very nice.
And for a hundred rupees more, a
bed up in the loft. And another hundred rupees for some lighting over the main
floor. And with each job, the same riotous blackout occurred, Bolson and Karson
both yelling and sawing and hammering and yelling some more until the job was
done.
That was it for the installation projects. Next I had him
add to the mounts on my wall, and he charged me for each one. Two more weapon
mounts on the far wall, three shield mounts on the right wall below the loft,
and three bow mounts on the left wall. Not in that order, but that’s where they
appeared.
With the mounts—and the door—in place, I mounted Mipha’s Spear,
and the Ceremonial Trident, along with the stylish Forest Dweller’s Shield, and
my trusty, trusty Phrenic Bow. They would be safe and secure in this house. And
kept from cumbering me out on the field.
When I was out of mounting options
and other interior projects, I had Bolson do exterior work. Even in the rain.
Oh I first moved Knight into the roofed stall off the west side of the house
and out of the wet. (He and I looked amazing
together while I wore the Dark Series.) But I still made Bolson work, despite
the cutscenes being robbed of their vibrancy in the silver haze. Plant flowers!
Plant trees! (I could hardly spot the wide-angle differences in the downpour.)
And finally, A sign with my name on it!
And Bolson and Karson hollered
their way through it all, as the last drops finally began to peter out.
The sign stood neatly on its own
little pedestal just to the left of the path from the bridge to my door; and it
read, I could see after I’d studied it for a moment:
MASTER LINK
PRESENTED
BY SAKURDA BUILDERS
And when all that had been done,
Bolson said “YOU... HOUSING MONSTER!” Or something like it. “You got
everything?”
And since I had worked him for all
he was worth, he threw in some free furniture for me. (“Karson! Look alive!”)
And that.... was that.
And Bolson and Karson left off.
And my house was a home.
And the sidequest Hylian Homeowner flashed across my
screen.... Complete.
My
gosh, how long had it been?
I didn’t know.
Home complete.... I rode Knight
back to Dueling Peaks. Still in my Dark Getup. And the Bokoblins we passed....
leapt out in blatant attacks.
Um....
they didn’t seem very fooled.
I asked David if bad guys did this
when he wore the Dark Suit, but he
hadn’t bought this set. It was expensive.
Some field research was in order it
seemed. I got to Dueling Peaks, boarded Knight, and ran down the road west between
the peaks toward the Bokoblin camp. They were all asleep.
So I woke them up with a whistle.
Or... did I? They seemed to come to before I could blow. Hmm.
And they all attacked me.
What
the heck, Kilton?
One of them hit me with an arrow,
and it HURT! D:<
Good gravy that took off a lotta hearts!
Under further attack, I warped away
mid-stun to Cotera. Maybe she could
upgrade the stuff.
But it was unupgradable.
-_- What in the heck, Kilton?
The ensemble.... didn’t seem to
have any good perks.... that I could immediately discern....
But getting another idea I kept it
on anyway, and started having the Great Fairy cast her upgrades on my spare
Flamebreaker Armor. I had the materials and I just wanted to see something....
I had her upgrade until the kiss. And the little cinematic gave me a
clear view of Link’s red-eyed, black-skinned, dark, evil, behooded face.
Oh....
Yeah
he definitely bore his teeth more in
this outfit....
Sneering.
Leering. Narrow-eyed menacing.
My
gosh.
Well that was nightmarish.
I reloaded without saving to just
before the Great Fairy because I wanted to keep my Smotherwing Butterflies.
Well.
Now what.
....
As long as I was in Kakariko, I
went and tried it on the Guardian out back. The Dark Series.
But nope, the Guardian still saw me
and got mad. Piano all riled up.
Hm.
I was running out of gas.
....
I warped to the Hateno Ancient Tech
Lab and visited Purah. Scared her and Symin with the Dark Suit all right! Symin
says—(uh?)—that I can add pictures to
my Compendium for a price.... huh, not sure if I knew that before....
Paraglided to.... my house. Scared
Bolson on the way.
I have a house now.
And it does look nice.
And it is inviting.
I changed out of my Dark Suit and
into my Champion’s tunic, Hylian Hood and Hylian Trousers.
It was 1:10 in the afternoon.
I slept in my very own bed for the
first time, until the morning.
Good
night.
And at church the next morning,
Shelene and I sang. A beautiful song about how by serving the needy, we truly
serve Christ, and enrich our own
lives as well. And throughout the rest of the cracks between church, women kept
coming up to me, and I assume to Shelene as well, to tell me that our singing
had moved them to tears.
