More Loose Ends

Evening of Sunday, April 14, 2019

More Loose Ends

I was in my Hateno House.

....

I didn’t even remember what I was doing.

So I decided to wrap up the sidequests.

First.... Kula’s Ice Rod. That Korok who was like another Nebb. He wanted to see an Ice Rod....

I searched Hebra, and had no luck, just a lot of Blizzrobes. Wrong rod. I searched the Gerudo Highlands, and found another Blizzrobe.... no good.... but then—!! There was an Ice Wizzrobe! That one had what I needed!

I killed it, and took its Ice Rod. I also tried for the swooping Farosh, but he took off before I could shoot him.

Well, if I’d chased two rabbits, both would’ve escaped.

I got what I came for.

I warped to see Kula in the Korok Forest, and showed him the Ice Rod.

He gave me a hundred rupees.

Cool.

Next.... Dugby’s Stick. Dugby that little Goron kid who was always hanging out in the hot springs near the Bridge of Eldin. He’d hidden something, probably a weapon, somewhere near there. And he said I could keep it if I found it....

I warped to the shrine near the Bridge of Eldin and started poking around.... hahhh, as I’d poked around many times before. Where was this thing? Dugby said it was between the hot springs and the Bridge of Eldin, but I’d never yet been able to find any hidden special “schticks”!

I just kept my eyes peeled for butterflies in the meanwhile.

At length I got up on top of that stretch that overhangs the railtrack, and wandered back to the far side of it, and—

ROOOOOCKS?

They were hidden around the back of a big upjutting protrusion of the red volcanic stone. A big grey clump of what was decidedly the explodable variety!

How long had these been here?

I blew it up.

In the hollow behind lay a Drillshaft. Heh, hadn’t seen one of those in a while. I took it back to Dugby.

He was amazed. Yeah he thought he’d heard a loud noise, he said.... XD

Well, I found it, so he’d let me keep it.

Cool.

I’d also found three Smotherwing Butterflies while I was there. That was enough for the Flamebreaker Armor, plus one for to keep in my pocket. Who was the closest Fairy?

Mija.

I warped.

Oh, but I needed Hinox guts for the Flamebreaker Armor as well, and.... I was short one. Dang.

But I could upgrade either the Soldier’s Armor or the Barbarian Armor. I’d run out of Naydra Horn if I did the Barbarian, BUT.... I did have enough Lynel Guts for it. Finally.

But which to choose....

Naydra Horn....

....

I chose the Soldier’s Armor. Got it up to 84 Defense! Sweet.

Next.... Shrines.

I just went to Kakariko. Checked those woods. That pedestal. Back up on the hill in Cotera’s Forest. There MUST be a shrine there. And there MUST be a Shrine at the Eldin Great Skeleton.... but how....?

I chased Naydra’s tail as I climbed further up into the mountains, but.... he gone.

Went back to the village.

Visited Impa. Didn’t save.

Reload.

One more memory, and that’s in the castle.

Ain’t got time for that, bro.

Pepp’s and bed.

GOOD NIGHT.

But I Like The Red Rocks

Afternoon of Sunday, January 27, 2019

But I Like The Red Rocks

I started up in my own house in Hateno Village.

I wanted to go see what Hudson was up to. Bolson had wondered about him, said something maybe about trouble.... or had hinted that Hudson couldn’t have gotten into too much of such.... which meant....

Mmmm I roved over my mental map of Akkala, wondering where he could have gone. The land was lush and green all over, but I could not banish the lake from my thoughts....

And if he was at Lake Akkala.... well, dude, freakin’—there were Guardians in there!

I warped to the Wolf Shrine—that shrine low north of Zorana, on the cliffs overlooking the waterfalls and the fairy fountain. Wolves had harrassed me when I first came upon it, and were still often seen nearby. And I ran off the cliff and paraglided toward that jut of land just downtrail from Mija’s little copse, out over Lake Akkala.

Standing all alone over the water....

But of course.... There was nothing else there. Nothing but a Goddess statue....

And I drew nearer to the islandy formation and lo! I saw.... some structures there.... And I saw Hudson! Picking away at a rock! He was okay!

I floated down on the landbridge for a proper approach, and the new name of the place gleamed across my screen: Tarrey Town.

Tarrey Town? Was this where he was expanding? Was he settling here?

I had a nice conversation with Hudson. Gave him ten bundles of wood for materials. I didn’t mind helping him! Aww it was good to see him well! ^_^

But the great hulking boulders on this.... island for lack of a better term.... He needed somebody strong, like a Goron (but with a last name ending in –son, per policy), to come and help him get rid of them.

:(

But I liked the shape of this island. And Akkala’s red rocks were so pretty....

Oh humm hmmm.... This seemed fit to develop into something massive and irrevocable.

....

I reloaded back at my house. Without saving.

Dipped around for a little bit.... Mounted a couple more weapons....

Currently, from left to right around the lower room’s walls, the setup consisted of: the Falcon Bow gifted by Teba, My Trusty Phrenic Bow, (empty); the Lightscale Trident, (empty), the Ceremonial Trident; (empty), the Forest Dweller’s Shield, and the Kite Shield.

I just liked the look of the Rito Shield.... And it was still fresh anyway. So was the Falcon Bow.

I liked Akkala’s beautiful red rocks—how could I move forward with this?

....

Eh, it would autosave occasionally. I just called it a day.

Return to Hateno

Waking of Tuesday, June 5, 2018

Return to Hateno

I wanted to play, but there were people around; I could not continue on with my main quest with that kind of buzzkill risk hanging in the air.

Have I only lost faith in humanity?

Hm.

I warped from Gerudo Canyon to the Shrine of Kaam Ya’Tak. There were plenty of crawlies in there; surely one of them would drop an Ancient Core for me....

No joy.

So I warped to Hateno—I could have sworn there was somebody who sold Guardian parts SOMEWHERE near there.... someone I’d met a long time ago on the road....

No luck.

But I did buy that fancy armor set David had reminded me of in his playthrough—the Soldier’s Armor. And I showed Nebb the Moblin Club, for which viewing he gave me fifty rupees! That was nice. :) The next thing he wanted to see was a Duplex Bow....

Haeh, well.... given where I was fixing to go in the near future that didn’t seem like too tall an order.

I also cleaned up an old sidequest by stepping behind the counter and addressing the lady inkeep directly. Dunno why I hadn’t tried that before.... I asked her what she liked, and she told me “Darners!” more out of a desperation to get rid of me than out of honest consideration. I relayed this to the lovesick chump down the street who’d put me up to it, whereafter he paid me a royal rupee for a handful of my own darners. I don’t even remember which kind.... I had plenty to spare.

I also made a friend at the inn, Worten. He was just sitting out on this patio I had never explored, looking content with the world. He was a traveler like me, and he told me about a few of the places he’d visited—or at least tried to; he hadn’t actually made it to Goron City. Nor had he been able to enter Gerudo Town. But he said if I was looking for adventure, I might try Zora’s Domain or Rito Village, though both of those were quite a ways away.

The sight of him contentedly sipping from his mug as he sat there in the breezy shade was so happily striking that I took a pictograph.

It’s a good one.

I felt like I might have been overworking poor Cotera, so I warped to Mija’s fountain in Akkala to see what she could make of my new armor set. She was able to enhance each piece two levels at least—three levels for the greaves. But I needed Hinox guts for further upgrades.

Fortunately I knew where a few Hinoxes could be found.

At Digdogg Suspension Bridge I left I think it was Memory a couple of bridges out while I marched straight in and killed the Hinox myself—ON FOOT! And I didn’t even get squished. :)

But the brute didn’t drop any guts. Cheapskate.

I boarded Memory again, warped to Dueling Peaks, took out Brown, and—dear me.... as I had done long ago in the dreary, dreary rain.... rode him down the long Hateno Road.

I had not taken that road in so, so long.

Why is that?

....

I don’t know.

Maybe my very first Yiga encounters had made me shy of it.

Maybe the pressing danger of the Yiga and the madness of the Valley of Terror had made me detest Hateno, and its road.

I still have not purchased that house.

....

We’ll see.

I spoke to everyone I met along the Hateno Road, and this time.... good luck was with me—I met a man named Teli, who sold GUARDIAN PARTS. Er, Ancient Tech, I mean.

However bad luck was with me too, for he carried no cores.

Hhhhh.

I rode Brown onward into Hatenooooish lands. One more place to check.

David keeps saying They’re in shrines! The cores.

Well, I knew of one shrine with a high chance of core capacity, that’s.... an odd way to word it.... core containment, no.... breach the core, um.... mockingbirds—

—I knew of ONE shrine with a high chance of containing an Ancient Core. I had quit from it many moons before in a bid to preserve mine own life. Just quit from it—I hadn’t known how to load a previous save from within the menu.

I had Brown take me back to it this time, while I maintained a rotation of different masks; for we passed roaming Moblins in the Woods of Concussion, and Bokoblins in the heights beyond.

The great, jutting mountain-cliff beside the sea was perhaps not well suited for horses, but we picked our way as best we could between stones and along ledges (Brown at one point attempting to align to a path crossing forty feet below us), and we made fair progress until we reached the highest, broadest open shelf.

The Shrine that stood at its tip over the ocean may very well have been the most prominent Shrine on the map. You could see it for miles from many directions. Maybe that’s what had drawn me to it so long ago. I’d been out of my depth, then. But now.... I was stronger.

On the flat, open ground Brown and I broke into a welcome gallop, slipping past the strong camp of curious Bokoblins until we were safe about the reaches of the shrine.

Even so, I led Brown around to the shady back of it, out of sight of the baddies.... just in case.

And then I stepped inside the shrine—the Muwo Jeem Shrine—and faced the long-feared Modest Test of Strength that had so daunted me into retreating before.

I beat it easily this time.

But there were still no cores for me.

Hhhh.

Well, it was another Spirit Orb anyway. I was overdue to pray at a Goddess statue....

I rode Brown back down the mountain [back toward home I wrote in my original notes—To Hateno? Strange of me....]—it was a little tricky to reclaim the path we had imagined for ourselves to get up here in the first place. And when we finally reached the road, I met Teli again.

I asked him about his wares just to see.

AND HE HAD A CORE!

I BOUGHT IT. FOR A COUPLE HUNDRED RUPEES AND THEN SOME.

SWEET.

Aha! So Ancient Cores could be bought!

It was raining as I galloped back westward. But I was feeling too jubilant—this called for a change of outfit! I ripped off my Bokoblin Mask. And then.... I ripped off everything else! And rode back to Dueling Peaks in my skin.

“Well, you’re looking peppy today, stranger!” said Tasseren the stablehand when I came to board Brown again, and I laughed.

The Worst of Bad Ideas

Waking of Friday, August 11, 2017 ~ 5

The Worst of Bad Ideas

I warped to Robbie’s place, and spoke with Cherry.

But I was still a few gears short—she wouldn’t be crafting me the Ancient Cuirass today.

Rats.

I went back outside. Full of the restlessness of the thwarted, I again regarded the large, cubic maze standing in the sea. The last (and only) time I’d tried to paraglide to it, I’d run out of stamina just before I got there.

I had more stamina now.

....

In a raging fit of stupid, I leapt for it again.

The wind was not on my side.

One, two, three, and four Guardian Flyers once again came into view as I neared, sweeping over the corridors like vultures. Did Guardian Stalkers roam the paths beneath?

There was the entrance, that solitary gap in the strange, monumental edifice.

I touched down near the lip with both altitude and stamina to spare.

Lomei Labyrinth Island it was called.

A Guardian Stalker crouched at the far end of the large, central court.

It wasn’t moving.

I consulted my map.

Only one pathway seemed to lead to the shrine at the back, the first pathway on the right off the central court.

I took a step—

And the monk of the Sheikah Shrine addressed me. His name was Tu Ka’Loh.

His treasure would be mine if I could find the end of the labyrinth.

And as his words ended, I realized the boundary of his foreboding welcome must also have been the boundary of that Guardian Stalker’s ken—for it lit up and started moving toward me, preceded by its needling laser....

I booked it to the right, found the hole, dashed in quick, turned around a corner, and hid, my heart’s blood in my eyes and my lungs running silent—where were those Flyers?

The Piano drew in close to me, plinking its unobtrusive G minor again.

I gazed at the blue crack of sky above me, waiting for one of them to pass, desperate to learn its pattern, and so evade it....

But if I sat here too long, would something else find me?

I looked at my map again. I could see the way to go. Maybe if I just made a run for it....

But as I turned corners, pressed myself into walls, wedged into alcoves and dead ends, my eyes combing the strips of sky above for deadly threats.... I found that the maze seemed to be emptier than I had thought.

Almost.

A few stray Keese and Flame Chuchus wandered here and there. But they posed little threat.

I had thought that, as my map seemed to indicate, some of the passages were only an intricate series of dead ends. But I soon discovered that they were more thoroughly interconnected than I could have imagined. Ladders led up to hidden chambers inside the walls, huge Magnesable blocks revealed further sprawling junctions.... I soon became quite lost, my only gauges of proximity to the shrine my Sheikah Slate and HUD.

Wandering in the northern reaches of the tangle, I soon turned off my shrine locator; the beeping combined with the towering entrapment of the maze was enough to make one mad. And the deceptive boundaries shown on my map eroded my resolve to follow the map at all. I began to chase down every avenue I could, running, turning, delving, trying, hitting dead ends, spilling into endless branches of corridors....

Actually I reminded myself something awful of Fleur Delacour in the fourth Harry Potter movie.

But I hadn’t quite lost my mind yet....

Eventually I did come to that topmost corridor on the map—the one that surely would lead me to the shrine—

It didn’t.

It was just a long hallway.

I could hear the Islander Hawks crying. But when I looked up, I only saw a Guardian Flyer sweeping over the top of the maze, the red light of its eye swiveling....

Seemed they couldn’t see all the way to the bottom where I was, though.

The mighty labyrinth walls were climbable, as it turned out.

The Flyers were only there to keep me from cheating.

For all the hidden passages there seemed to be, I could find no way to get to the western half of the labyrinth. I had dashed into that hole on the east, and east was where I had been. But was the way to the shrine in the western half of the island after all?

The only way I could see to get to the western side was to cross the central court. There was only one problem—and when I’d crossed into the maze, that problem had started patrolling around. The Guardian Stalker was still too big to enter the tight labyrinth passages. But it made the central space a very dangerous place to enter, or even to look in on. I’d passed by those doorways a few times, and every time the Guardian saw me, it would gleam hot red and the Piano would make a fuss before I got the heck outta there!

But I couldn’t be afraid forever.

And I needed to get to the western side of the labyrinth....

And—rare gifts I’d received, but never used—I did have four Ancient Arrows on me.

And I’d heard some hearsay lately.... One man I spoke to said he’d heard that an Ancient Arrow could take down a Guardian in one shot.

One shot?

I’d heard they were strong against Guardians, but.... Really?

Could it be true?

I could do it.

I just had to keep my cool.

Such a nervous thrill of dread as I stood around the corner of an entrance to the court, hearing the approaching tunk-tunk-tunk of its feet, watching its life-meter (1500) float across the screen—thanks, Champion’s Tunic.

I let it complete its pattern once more.... and then stepped out where it would see me on its next pass.... and waited.

It had wandered off northward, toward where the Shrine was. It would come back south along the west side before turning in my direction.... and it did.

A hot red glow. A rush from the Piano. The laser found my shirt. I zipped behind the corner again. But that didn’t quiet its intent approach.

I took another peek. So did the Guardian, with its laser. It was still coming my way as I again ducked behind the stone. It was quite a mossy old thing, now I took the time to look.

It came right up to the wall, right up to the entrance—dared I step where I could see its eye and try a few practice shots with normal—ITS LEG CAME THROUGH THE HOLE AND STARTED STEPPING AROUND NOPE—NOPE BACK UP—YUP—’KAY—THAT WAS A GOOD PRACTICE RUN—GONNA LET IT RESUME ITS PATTERN NOW.

I pulled back.

Good GRAVY I pulled back for a moment.

Okay.

Okay I just had to take care of business before it got that close again.

I could do this.

Hoooo....

It wandered back into its patrol, and I again stepped out from behind the corner. And again it turned to see me right on that parallel, dead ahead across the court. And again the Piano threw up the cry and the Guardian and I played a deadly game of peek-a-boo chicken with each other, I lingering so long on one look that it actually fired a blast into the hole where I was—I evaded the fireball.

And when it was close—but not too close—I stepped out for the last time and took aim with my bow and a plain, wooden arrow.

The Guardian glowed so bright magenta and angry, white-hot power whirring up in its casing as its laser found me.

It was close enough. I could hit that.

I let fly.

Khing!

That SOUND—that WINNING SOUND that lets you know you’ve struck somewhere tender!

And the Guardian lurched backward—its head swiveled as if to clear itself—found me again—glowed that angry red—

I let fly again.

Khing!

Another arrow to the eye! Another lurch, another stumble, another shaking and regaining itself—A shot to the eye could forestall the laser.

The Guardian locked onto me again.

And I let fly again.

Khing!

And that was enough practice.

The Guardian recovered, began to glow—

I nocked one of my four precious Ancient Arrows....

....and let fly.

And for some reason the spectacle I remember most vividly was not the smashing, the glowing, the shattering, the breaking, the crumbling down, the hot glowing to explode—

It was the instantaneous, complete and utter darkening.... erasing.... EMPTYING of the life-meter.

I, with one Ancient Arrow, had slain a Guardian Stalker.

I cheered as I ran out to collect the spoils it had left behind—including three Ancient Gears! Still left me one short for the Cuirass, but what progress this was! I would have to come back here after the next Blood Moon!

The central court was now mine to cross freely, and I plunged into the west side of the maze. This side likewise had hidden passages and alcoves, all in a deucedly confusing tangle. But after a very long while, I came to a series of staircases that took me up, up, up to the chamber where the Shrine was. Tu Ka’Loh you dastardly....

There was no challenge inside the shrine. Of course it was a Blessing Shrine.

I came up to the requisite chest, wondering if I’d have room in my inventory for whatever weapon this might be.

But it wasn’t a weapon this time.

It was a Barbarian Helm.

A menacing, bleach-bone skull over the crown; long, cruel, curving horns on either side; and a wicked mane of wily red hair down the back.

I might have accidentally glimpsed something like this on the internet once....

But seeing it now, taking my time to take it all in from every angle....

It was AWESOME.  >u<

Well, new clothes meant only one thing: time to see a Fairy.

I went first to Mija, then to Kaysa, and each of them enhanced my new Barbarian Helm by one level. But after that I needed more materials.... materials I didn’t have time to collect at that moment because of how very late it was and how very tired I was getting.

But content that I had conquered the most daunting shrine on my map, and acquired a WICKED new hat.... I warped back to the shrine by the Tabantha Bridge Stable.... saved.... and quit.

Revisiting the Dragon

Waking of Monday, July 3, 2017

Revisiting the Dragon

Loitering at the Lake Tower. Looking for Farosh.

I was patient this time, and eventually he did appear.

I tried something I hadn’t tried before: when the updrafts came, I leapt off the east turret of the southern bridge tower, paraglided up as Farosh loomed close—he was passing me rather quickly—nocked an arrow, took aim in the slowed time and let fly! Hoping I would hit his horn though it didn’t look like I did!

One of his attendant lightning balls zapped me and I fell in the lake and drowned.

BUT! When I respawned on the bridge, there was a glowing something down on the shore beneath the bridge! Had my arrow knocked it off?

I paraglided down, took a picture—was it one of those items the camera couldn’t identify?—and it was Farosh’s Scale.

Was this the thing that I needed?

Mmm part of me didn’t think so, but WHAT IF?

I looked around—Farosh was nowhere in sight. Where had he disappeared to?

Eh I guessed lightning dragon spirits could manifest or unmanifest at will.

I waited again.

And again Farosh came.

And again I shot him with an arrow! A bit more arbitrary this time, on the underbelly as he passed over the bridge, and I kept my feet on the solid stone.

And again a scale of his fell off and floated glowing in the water!

I paraglided down to collect it, and then warped away to the shrine near Mija’s Spring!

Unfortunately Mija couldn’t do anything with Farosh’s Scales. Evidently I really did need to land an arrow directly on Farosh’s horn.

Hhhhummmmm....

I wandered out to that other little red plateau or butte that stood above the wetlands, connected to the cliffs below Mija’s Spring by a thin, curving natural bridge. I hadn’t been out here before. I expected either a Korok.... or something sinister....

But I found neither. Instead there was a Goddess statue. <3

I was overdue for some praying—she gave me a heart container and another stamina vessel.

Heh, maybe now I can reach that big cubic maze island off Robbie’s laboratory....

But not just now; I was busy. Back to the lake I went.

And again I waited, in the meantime sporting with the Lizalfos in the middle of the bridge, and chasing a particularly devious Korok down one of the broken support pillars.

And again Farosh came.

I climbed back onto the southern bridge tower—it’s a pretty good spot—No wait I think I changed my mind. I got onto the bridge itself, directly in front of where Farosh would be going....

And he came closer.... and closer....

AND CLOSER....

And I jumped for it, pulled back an arrow, utilized the slowed time, adjusted for gravity and arcing, led the target a bit.... and let fly!

There was definitely a sound—a ringing, important-sounding sound, when you hit Farosh with an arrow.

I fired two arrows—had been firing twice at every jump so far, but had only ever managed to knock off one item at a time.

And it streaked off the dragon’s body in a long tail of light, down below the bridge again.

Was this the one I needed a boat to reach? I don’t remember. Dang Octoroks....

And this time.... this time.... I’D GOT IT!

A Shard of Farosh’s Horn! ^_^

And I looked around again, hoping he would make another pass.... but he had vanished again.

Where did he go?

I waited a long, long time for him to show his face again. Seemed he never did if you were looking for him.

One Lizalfos was still alive out on the bridge. An archer. I spent a lot of time running in, jogging back and forth in front of him, collecting the arrows he tried to shoot me with, and then jogging back out when the supply ran dry—after about six or so. I’d put distance between us until he disappeared, and then run back to see him repopulate on the screen, and do it all over again.

I milked that arrow-lizard for so long....

But then finally—the erhu sounded again.

Farosh time!

I ran back to that spot on the bridge.... leapt and fired in slow motion just the same—and got another hornshard. Excellent!

And I saw where Farosh went this time.

Evidently every time someone shoots him with an arrow, he flies straight up into the sky, twining higher and higher and higher—so slowly, so massively—until a great cloudy vortex coalesces high in the heavens, and swallows him up.

Well I guess I can’t really blame him.

If somebody were shooting me with arrows, I’d leave too.

Sorry, Farosh!

Back to Mija!

And she worked her magic!

That souped up my Champion’s Tunic all right! 8 to 14! Dandy! ^_^

And now.... NORTHWARD! Along the path to Chariots-of-Fire Beach and then inland toward the Quarry! There was a memory there, I was quite sure of it....!

One Last Hitch

Waking of Saturday, May 27, 2017 ~ 6

One Last Hitch

I pranced past the wolves again—you know, if you zap one with a Flame Rod, the rest’ll leave off sure enough but.... there won’t even be any cooked meat left—and down round the cliffside to the little wood with the pond.

And there in the pond was a large green cocoon.

I stepped up on the toadstool pedestal and addressed the being inside.

She was likewise afflicted by the lack of well-wishers and gift-offering devotees, but could have her powers restored if I gave her.... five hundred rupees.

Well. I was loaded enough for that. Chump change.

I handed it over—brought myself below six thousand again but no matter—and the Great Fairy’s cocoon blossomed and opened into a beautiful deep blue flower. (Cotera’s had been pink.) She burst from the large mystic pool in the center of the blossom, huge, gaudy, sparkling....

Her name was Mija and she was decked much as her sister Cotera had been, but in garb and jewelry of light lavender, rather than pearly white. And her hair matched: she sported an absolutely voluminous purple pompadour, which looked big enough for me to legitimately get lost in if she leaned over too far.

I just love the Great Fairies’ designs. X-)

She thanked me for restoring her power, and I set her loose on my wardrobe. One by one she upped the defense of my garments. Cotera had worked her magic by blowing over her palms at me, as though to dust me with mystic glitter. Mija simply kissed her forefinger and then gave me a cutesy loving tap that made me blush.... whether in embarrassment or patient disgust I couldn’t tell—WHO DESIGNED THESE ENCOUNTERS they’re so adorable.... though Mija’s elegantly painted fingernail looked big enough to scratch my face clean off....

She was able to modify all of my garments except for one—the Champion’s Tunic.

To fix it up, she needed a few Lizalfos horns, which I had; some other variety of monster-bits I don’t remember, which I also had; and—

I coughed.

Two shards of Farosh’s horn?

O.O

Well that.... would be an epic thing to collect! OuO!!!

But right now there was no more time for delays! It was time to head north!

It was time to find Robbie!

Down the sweeping mountainside I jogged, the seashore creeping in on my right side. I ran from wolves; I ignored Lizalfos. I had somewhere to be. Strange landmarks I had seen in my map passed in and out of view as the land leveled out just above sea level. The beach pressed close along the grassbound road, and I huffed beside the waves, both 10,000 Miles and Chariots of Fire ringing simultaneously through my head as I jogged through the yellow-grey grass....

There were road signs to the Akkala Ancient Tech Lab. I was getting close.

The land began to climb again, and off in some trees on the east side, a woman tried to flag me down.

Eh, I hadn’t practiced in a while....

She asked me something about Lord.... Lord.... Lord Somebody. Must’ve been some Yiga bigwig. Oh, how I was tempted to give the insulting response, but.... I thought to probe for information instead.

But the woman only fawned a bit more over this person and then....

(Ah, and the Piano always drips the same high chill down the back of your neck!)

“I will take your life!” she hissed.

We fought.

I won.

“And I will take your bananas!” I answered.

And I did.

Further on there was yet another Stable! The East Akkala Stable. And there was a man there who sold hot buns for ten rupees apiece—each one granted an entire extra temporary stamina wheel.

I’ll have to remember that.

There was another man there, a soldier-looking type of fellow, who asked me if I had heard of Kilton.

! As a matter of fact I had! From that Chabi woman I met at the parade grounds. But she’d seemed so genuinely interested in the man....

But Soldier Fellow impressed upon me that this Kilton was some kind of menace, and that he was the source of many awful rumors and much disquiet. A general disturber of the peace.

He asked me, if I ever met Kilton, to very carefully note his appearance, so that I could describe it back to him in detail.

Eh.... I agreed.

Seems this Kilton is taken for good and ill.... I do wonder what all the fuss is about....

But I would not wonder now.

Robbie was right up the road. Just a little father!

I hoofed it up the hill!

I was so close!

I could see the outline of the laboratory! A giant telescope and great bits and shapes sticking out in all angles—

A red targeting laser needled onto my shirt.

The Piano turned wicked....

Cover. Run, I thought. Keep running.

But no, there was no cover in my course. Where was it coming from? Recalculation would take precious time....

I turned wildly—I had passed a large red rock jutting out of the earth to the right of the path.

The rusted Guardian had been right on the other side of it.

No one coming from the direction of the stable would have been able to see it.

That was dirty! D:

I ran back to regain the other side of the rock—the laser flickered—that high beeping—

I didn’t make it in time.

The blast sent me rolling.

But I was still alive. Probably thanks to Mija’s very recent upgrades!

But only just. How many hearts did I have left, three? Four? Not enough to take another hit. I got back to my feet as the Guardian began to recharge its laser, and dashed back round the boulder to skid to a panting halt on the other side.

Three hulking Stalmoblins popped up out of the ground to keep me company.

Man.

The Piano turned a different flavor of wicked as I quickly reached into my pockets for something to eat; I rather wanted a few more hearts on my side before I dealt with these bozos....

Once they were dead the Piano left off and it was quiet. I wasn’t quite sure what to do. I could still hear the Guardian swiveling its head around on the other side of the rock. Looking for me.

I climbed a bit onto the red stone—thank goodness it wasn’t too steep to stand on—and had a careful look.

The guardian seemed fixated on the road. Just swiveling back and forth, glowing a vigilant blue....

Huh.

Well, first I appealed to Ja Baij. Purah had upgraded my bombs after all. I decided to see what they could do.

I chucked one over the top of the rock. But I detonated it too soon and the Guardian took no damage. It was tricky without being able to see the shape of the ground on the other side.

I chucked another one, waited a little longer.... and detonated again.

The Guardian’s health went from 500 to 498.

It shot a blast at nothing and swiveled harder.

Well that wasn’t very encouraging.

I chucked a few bombs more, gnawing away at the Guardian for a while and making it blow up bits of earth near the path at every turn, but....

This was taking too long. I had to hit it with something harder.

I consulted my bows and equipped the strongest one, and readied my Shock Arrows. I had quite a few to spare.

And after a deep breath, I jumped forward, stood up tall on the top of the rock, drew back my bow and waited for its eye to turn my way.... If things went sour, I could just back up and fall back into cover....

But it never turned. It just kept swiveling at the road. Creeping thing....

I put the Shock Arrow away and loaded a regular one. Just to test it.

It tunked off the back of the Guardian’s head, and it turned to see me.

I shot its eye!

AND IT STUTTERED! Shaking and swiveling as though trying to clear itself, trying to reset!

I shot its eye again!

The damage was mounting up considerably faster!

I shot it again and again in the eye! Sometimes it swiveled too far to the side and I lost my target but.... I was patient.... I could wait....

Did any of my bows break? I don’t remember. But I had plenty of equipment with me....

And every time its eye turned my way I shot it again.

Its energy dropped farther, and farther again until.... with a whirring and a crackle of shattering light.... ITS SHELL BUCKLED AND IT EXPLODED!

I KILLED A GUARDIAN!

I KILLED A GUARDIAN!

HAHH.

Now . . . . I will know

. . . . whether GUARDIANS . . . .

RESURRECT AT BLOOD MOON.

The Akkala Ancient Tech Lab was waiting up the hill.

I followed the path just a little bit farther—more rusted Guardians glowered at me all around the house—

They were dead.

Dang it, Robbie.

I approached the door, and let myself inside.

A pot-bellied.... machine of some kind, with a stylized, slit-eyed face and a mouth that looked like it could open, stood in the middle of the room.

“I... It’s...” it juddered in a hollow metallic voice. “An... It’s...”

What did that mean?

“What are you doing here?”

Two Sheikah stood behind me: a well-built woman of average height, and a tiny little old man wearing the strangest goggles.... Could that be....?