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Breath of the Wild ~ a Log / CONTENTS [[+Artwork]]

Showing posts with label love letter. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love letter. Show all posts

Saturday, September 22, 2018

Snail's Race


Friday, July 6, 2018


Today I sent my letter to Eiji Aonuma.

The Letter Is Away.

It’d been such a long time coming....
I’ve been known to sabotage myself with meticulous perfectionism, apathetic depressive bouts, distractionary wanderings and outright laziness—that letter was delayed by no hand but my own.... but I still meant it with all my heart. And I hope that that comes through. English notwithstanding.
If nothing else, maybe the handwritten “ありがとう” I added beside the picture can be enough.

I actually sent it away and out of my hands. It’s gone.
I showed myself that I could keep moving forward.

Even a snail can finish a race if he just keeps crawling.



I might not have the mind to spare for anticipation, though.
Vacation is impending.

Wednesday, August 8, 2018

Sometimes


Waking of Tuesday, May 29, 2018


D-amphetamine.
Venlafaxine.
Prazosin.
Mirtazapine.
Ketamine.
Theta burst.
Uhrmm the Iodine feels pretty good, actually. Better.
Better than I’ve been . . . in years.
Thanks, Alex.


Had it really been three months?
Three months?
That was so long....
And how long had it been since December? Nearly half a year?
What was wrong with me?


My name is Andrea and I suffer from depression.

Sometimes I used to joke to myself and to others: “I can’t kill myself—I haven’t played the next Zelda game!”
‘Cause, you know . . . . it feels like there’s always gonna be another one . . . . somewhere down the road.

What happened in December? Oh, I was just writing a letter. To the Big Guy. Aonuma. Regarding this log. Wanting to share. Just wanting to share my mad little fan-love catastrophe I seem to have created here.
I haven’t sent it yet—the lower corner of the back page just looked so empty, like it wanted to hold some fanart. So I set to drawing some.
I haven’t finished that either.
Maybe I just wanted it to be too perfect. And I set out to do it, and then I get daunted and discouraged; I used to draw ALLTHE FRIGGIN’TIME, what the heck was the matter with me?

Sometimes you have bad breakdowns.
Dark times.

But sometimes you find a respite, or solace from a kindly hand.
Encouragement.

And this Tuesday . . . . well it was blessedly quiet and calm. Much needed after two hours’ sleep the night before and only a brief nap in between.
Not three months. I couldn’t go past three months. I turned on the game.
I was still in the Deku Tree’s Navel.
And there was that doppelganger song again. Like an older, slightly more mature brother to the SS Faron Woods music.
Ah but even now as I try to recall it.... all I can hear is the colorful Kikwi forest....
But it was . . . . nice.

I wished I could play the discovery of the Master Sword again, but.... my last manual save was all the way back in the Spring of Courage, and the next autosave after that was already in the Keo Ruug Shrine.
Mmmm too far removed and out of reach....
Hhhh, and I dared not trigger another autosave by moving from the place that I was in—that tight little hollow. I just.... stepped around. Stood.

But the music was still so nice.
Soothing.
It was the nighttime version of the song.

In the end I only paused the game, turned the volume up a bit, and moved to where my computer and tablet were in the other room. How long had Photoshop been open with that file?

I cleaned up Link’s hair quite a bit, and added some more definition to his face—poor guy’s got eyes finally....
I wonder how many bandoliers and accessories I want to bother with. Even the Slate....?
But.... the evening and the conditions were good: I could still draw. I could still draw if I tried and if it was quiet. Maybe things like the Slate won’t be as difficult as I fear they might.

I didn’t realize how much just hearing the music would . . . .

I don’t know, it just made me feel . . . . It made the world feel . . . . softer.

It made it feel okay.

I had just been hurting so much and been so impatient for weeks.

Impatient for everything to just be over with.


I wanted to die.

Sometimes I still do.






Sometimes, I used to joke to myself.






Sometimes, it’s not a joke.






Sometimes you’ve just got to hold on to something.

Monday, October 2, 2017

FEVER


Waking of Saturday, May 27, 2017 ~ 3



There is a really joyous kind of abandon to this game that.... really doesn’t give a fig whether you’re hungry, or low on sleep, or even trying to keep a careful log.
There are colors in the distance, and creatures to behold.
There are hills with other sides to be got to....

Sometimes I forget why I’m writing this.
Sometimes I wonder what I’m even doing.

Part of it is for me. I’m a journaler, I’m a logger, I crave the art of crystalizing experiences within combinations of words—and this is one exciting adventure to take down!
But part of it is still a love letter too. Still one great big reaction comment composed with love to the game’s developers.

Hhhh, I just keep falling into this cycle lately. It goes like this:
1. Plunge into the game for several hours without coming up for air.
2. Jot down a skeleton of notes and then crash.
3. Guardians in all my nightmares.
4. Flesh notes out into proper log entries.
5. Get super caught up in finessing the writing until I think I’ll never catch up to my last save point.
6. Procrastination Oreos.
7. Half-watch David play when it’s not too spoilerish, and if he starts laughing at how few shrines I have compared to him, remind him that I’m still way richer than he is. And I have Zora pants.
8. Ache to play the game again myself.
9. Remember that I’m not writing a friggin’ novel; zoom out, pull back, and gloss over with quicker, easier log entries until I write up to where I am in the game.
10. Repeat.

It drives me.... only a little bit batty.
HuHHH I didn’t want to keep falling into that one; it’s just that I love the game so much. I love to play it. I love running around the world and seeing where the trails lead and rooting out the secrets.
I’d thought to just take smaller bites of the gameplay, to make the logging easier, but....
Oh man....
KNOWING the heaps of self-inflicted homework it would lay on me, and yet.... feeling so full of a glorious lack of concern, and ultimately deciding that.... I didn’t care!

~

It was with the freest, sunniest abandon that I forgot the Hateno House, warped to Zora’s Domain, climbed up into Upland Zorana, and paraglided into the warm, autumnal glow of the north countries. The sweet lush valleys I had so scarcely laid eyes on.
(Which was the same route David used to get into Zora’s Domain, by the by: he Cryonised his way up one of the waterfalls near Toto Lake.
He said he’d tell me some day and now he’s told me and now I’ve recorded it.)
I sailed down into lush grass beneath ruddy trees with golden leaves, where red rocks broke through the surface of the earth in lumps and piles and wild cascades just begging to be jumped and hiked and climbed upon!
Scattered a pack of wolves just to enter that first nearby shrine!
Crossed over beautifully shaded bridges beside towering, romantic waterfalls beneath the cliffs of Zorana!
Trekked westward past the Akkala Parade Ground Ruins!
There were parades here once? :D
Contracted a tiny case of the willies as I looked over the big open square—decided to stay on the road!
All the while the terrible Sheikah Tower patrolled by Guardian Flyers loomed tall and mighty above me to the north....
Threw a bokoblin off a woman named Chabi, who gave me in return.... what some kind of Monster Essence? 8O
Said she got it off a guy named Kilton, who runs some kind of establishment called Fang and Bone, and that it’s only open at night, and it deals in.... all things monster??
She said that essence would go great in any dishes I cooked, but.... I had reservations.
Continued west as the path gained in altitude, and came upon—a diverging of the ways! The bridge north to the tower? Or a paraglider float west to a very near stable?
Briefly felt like Robert Frost! D:
HNNNGGG Decided to lock down the stable first and SO....
Continued west again!
Rescued a couple of sisters from some more bokoblins! How dandy it was to be able to read my enemies’ health-meters!

“I got the Champion’s Tunic!” I had joyed to David.
“Oh!” he gave me a polite smile, “where’d you get it?”
“Impa gave it to me!”
—And his furrowing brow made his eyes narrow at me and he looked confused....
Well where’d he get his Champion’s Tunic?

Continued along the yellowy path!
Found the Foothill Stable and beat the resident shrine!
Cliiiiimmmbed the long road back to the bridge toward the north!
SPORTED WITH SOME BAD GUYS AND FOUND SOME LOVELY WEAPONS!
CROSSED THE BRIDGE TOWARD THE NORTH.... CLOSER TO THE AWFUL TOWER....
Found.... another Stable first! :D The South Akkala Stable!
This was Akkala! I knew it!
Robbie was somewhere close!
And that tower, high up on the red crag, had to have the Akkala map!
Started climbing the red, red rock!
Encountered—

Oh....

Right....

GUARDIAN FLYERS. .__.

Wednesday, April 5, 2017

Breath of the Wild ~ a Log / CONTENTS [[+Artwork]]


https://www.deviantart.com/contraltissimo/art/Logging-752139125

Breath of the Wild
a Log


Evening of Wednesday, April 5, 2017 (plus several finicky editings through April 16 because I couldn’t leave it alone)

It’s dangerous to go alone! Read this.

What is this? This is the log of a casual gamer, regarding Nintendo’s The Legend of Zelda ~ Breath of the Wild, as played by Contraltissimo.
Played by who? “Contraltissimo” is my screenname. It’s Archaic Fake Italian for “She Whose Voice Shaketh The Walls”. But please, you can just call me Connie. <3
Why is it here? Well that’s an interesting story. Come step inside the mind of a mad journaler and find out....

On the evening of Thursday, March 2, 2017, near the midnight hour, I was loitering around my local GameStop in the company of several dozen others all waiting to pick up some soon-to-be-newly released items, among which, for me, was a copy of The Legend of Zelda ~ Breath of the Wild for WiiU.
It was a chilly but excited atmosphere, full of anticipation at the closure of long-arranged preordering business, as well as the dogged hopefulness of those who kept vigil for hours in camp chairs and blankets, waiting for the first-come-first-served grab at one of eight spare Switch units. I had known that feeling before. Brave souls.
The clock struck twelve, I picked up my game (and some amiibos), and I took it home and played it for several glorious hours, caring nothing for the next day, for I’d taken it off work. (I always find myself with extra vacation days at fiscal year’s end, so I’d figured.... what the hey!)
Oh the game was delightful to be sure, and striking. And, being an avid journaler, I felt moved just to write down one of the moments that struck me early on. I had dropped little snapshots of exciting video games into my journals before; it pleased me to do it again.
And that was the snowflake that started the avalanche.
As long as I was recording that one moment, I thought it might be nice just to write up the preceding context. The game had barely begun; it wouldn’t take that long. And setting up a cradle of details and nuances would give the entry a much more distinct flavor.
I would have had it all sewn up after that, but.... as I continued playing, those striking moments that left me in awe, or puzzlement, or fear, or invigoration—they kept mounting up. They weren’t necessarily the earth-shattering twists which tend to come few and far between in a good story (though there were some of those, too); they were just.... little things: a turn, a sound, a stumbling failure, the sun on the water or a slipshod reason to smile. And they were much, much more numerous.
Great and terrible gears started turning in my head. This game was looking to turn out just stellar.... and I was playing it through for the very first time.... and initial playthroughs are always special, because the secrets and surprises are all fresh, the twists and turns jarring....
All those striking, moving, jolting moments weren’t too numerous, I thought.... I could just record them all! Each one as it came along. Just glimpses of the game, really. Highlights. That wouldn’t be too hard, would it? And with an extensive collection of first impressions of this most glorious new iteration of Hyrule, why, I could very well capture the feeling, the essence, the magic of a first-time playthrough in type! What an archival treasure that would be....
But I still wasn’t done heaping it onto my already full plate, because I considered further still.... So many moments, all disjointed.... Could they really retain their depth, their tone and timbre, so isolated? Could a mere excerpt still bear the emotional weight of its entire native milieu? They needed better connecting. They needed the bits in between. And the wild thought of the challenge rose in my mind: I’d recorded a lot of experiences in my life, but I had never yet attempted to journal my way through an entire video game.
What an intriguing notion!
What an exciting project!
What a gargantuan undertaking! I knew I should’ve set all my affairs in order before I started playing the game.
But hey, anything worth doing.... is worth overdoing.
And so I kept on playing, and kept on writing.
So that’s how the log came to be, but why is it on the internet? Well, that part’s kind of a deviation from my typical writing habits. Most of my material ends up either in convoluted folder hierarchies on my hard drives, or in the thirty-pound box of journals under my bed. Unless it’s fanfiction but, oh boy, let’s not go there; I’m trying to quit, I swear—it’s been years since my last incident.
My log on Breath of the Wild had grown and evolved from an interesting remark, to a detailed anecdote, to a sketch series, to a fantastical epic. But at some point, as I played through the beautiful game.... part of my writing just wanted to be a love letter.
Breath of the Wild is a work of art, created by amazing and talented artists.
I too am an artist. As such, I know that artists tend to enjoy seeing the effects their work has had on those around them. They like to see people’s reactions.
That’s how it is for me anyway. I love to know what goes through people’s heads and hearts when they look at my paintings or read my stories or listen to my songs.
And I just had a feeling that.... maybe the same went for the creators of video games.
That was why I brought this log to the internet; it was in the hopes that somehow, someway, maybe someone who was involved in the game’s creation or localization might see it, and know all the flavors of astonishment his fine work has wrought on the soul of the common consumer.
Not by straight feedback; I’m not writing to produce critiques. I am simply recording my adventures, my misadventures, and my reflections, as I inhabit the avatar of a young man named Link, in his trekking across the ruggedly beautiful land of Hyrule.
Maybe that’s the most honest feedback I can give.
Hhhh, now if only I spoke Japanese.

In the meantime, dear denizens of the internet, I bid you welcome to my log.
To those who may be traveling the same roads, I hope these accounts may be as much a source of reminiscence for you as they are for me, of the happenstance and hardship, and the wild things we see, the terrors we strive against, and the delights we discover.
To those who have never set foot in Hyrule before, may this writing do it some kind of justice, and give you a taste of the land loved by Goddesses, menaced by dark Power, and protected by the Spirit of a Hero.
Let’s breathe the wild air together.

CONTENTS

The Goddess in the Ruins
First Blood
The Tower
The Shrine(s)
Bitter Cold
New Heights
Bad Things
The Old Man Again
The Moblin
Human Life!
A Long Road
Blood Moon
The Second Tower
A New Hat!
A Drop on the Bokoblins
The Stables
Brown
Fearful Nights
Mr. Hestu
Travelers Like Me
Kakariko Village
Impa's Message
A New Quest
Encounter at Kakariko Bridge
Safety in Numbers
This is why all Heroes are called Fools
Shrouded
Hateno Village
The Third Tower
Concussive Logging
A Proper Exploration
A Rocky Path
Ears Burning
A Friendly Forest
By the Fire
An Encounter with SATAN
Oh Snap
Rocky Road
Fort Hateno Again
WE GOT A LIVE ONE
The Storm
Ledo
Rompered
Grumblers
Zoras, Zoras Everywhere
The Man with the Winning Smile
Blood Rain
Cheer Squad Prince Sidon
Rivan
Unsaved
The Deviated Hero
Zora's Domain
Lord of the Zoras
Hundred-Year-Old Memory
Mystical Shishkabob
DEEPLY MOVED
What is Courage?
The Tale of the Dread Octorok
Dance with the Devil
Shatterback Point
TWO HEROIC MEN TOO AWESOME FOR WORDS
Divine Beast Vah Ruta
ALL MY SKILL
AND THEN SOME
Mipha's Grace
Zora's Domain Again
Adventures in Zorana
Sirens of West Necluda
The Fool Remiss
Mind the Daisies
Regarding THE WORLD
Errand Boy
Without a Paddle
The Fool Cautious
A Familiar Face
Madman Joseph
With a Fine-Toothed Comb
Free Enterprise
The Last River
Bad Blood
Higher Than Thou
Full Circle
The Silent Treatment
Right Under My Nose
Oasis in the Water
The Fool Reckless
Fight For Your Honey!
Not So Simple
Grace of Life
What I Came For
The Forest
AN UNEXPECTED AND IMMEDIATELY URGENT DETOUR
Sweaty Palms
RETURN OF THE FOOL
The Maddest Dash
Dead End at Digdogg
KAAM YA'TAK
Dead End with Dai
The Entry With No Name
Off-White Memory
At Jeddo Bridge
Heavenly Apex . . . Rock Bottom
One Last Look
The Long Way Back
More Bad Things
The Erhu Sublime
Water's End
Old Friends
Calling it Quits
All Heroes
Family Ties
Riding the Dragon
Beyond Whistling Hill
Taking Care of Business
FEVER
Chills
Thing Under The Mountain
One Last Hitch
Rockin' Robbie
There's Something About Cherry
The Forest of Killing Time
Hylian Barbecue
THE WAYS
The Lynels' Corridor
Hylian Sauté
The Tallest Tower
Ant Lions
Another Storm
Loose Ends
Revisiting the Dragon
Korok Guides
Close to Home
GUT CHECK
The Badlands
Afraid of the Dark
Good Friends
Procrastination
Even More Bad Things
To See What I Could See
The Trouble with Boomers
Bird-Man
At Tabantha Bridge
The Worst of Bad Ideas
Bird-Man Returns
HOTFOOTING IT
Big Boss Bludo
GREAT BALLS OF FIRE!
Girl Stuff
Mon and Masks
The Most Dangerous Game
Fiery Portents
Hylian Charbroil
Divine Beast Vah Rudania
Ja Baij Triumphant
Daruk's Protection
A Walk with Yunobo
Volcano Wanderings
The Ultimate Game
The Big Dang Horse
Blue Bedlam
A Ride into the Desert
A Climb about the Canyon
Wasted in the Wasteland
Search and Rescue
Words of Wisdom
The Entry Not To Be Acknowledged
Distraction
Further Distraction
Horse Abuse
Gone Fishin'
THE MOUNTAIN'S CURSE
Goodbye, Memories
The Entry With No Point
In the face of my vexations
Kara Kara Bazaar
Under The Sentinel Sun
SAND SEALS
The Point With No Entry
The Prettiest Voe
Treasured in the Desert
Forbidden City, Take One
Forbidden City, Take Two
That Patience Which Holds Motionless for Endless Hours the Spider in its Web
The City Again
Ascent
Colossal
The Cyborg and the Madman
QUEST FOR PANTS
Fooling Myself
Into The Dragon's Maw
Deepest Woods
The Blade Of Evil's Bane
Sometimes
The Basement
Turning the Tables
The Piano's Rival
Link The Physical
Necluda's Backyard
Return to Hateno
Firefooted Flight
The Young Chief
Patience
Bane of Grace
The Value of Not Being Seen
The Devil Sympathetic
Ice and Fire
Marked
Unsaved Again
Unwarranted Reserve
Snail's Race
Spirit Orb Shenanigans
In The Breezy Shades Of Night
The Bravest
Divine Beast Vah Naboris
The Collected Hero
Urbosa's Fury
Friendly Neighborhood Hylian
Sand Seal Rally!
You Get The Thing
Another Deal in Contraband
Frozen Goods
Beyond Cotera's Forest
The Measure of Creation
Journey to Toruma
The Other Side of Limbo
All The World's a Pawn Shop
The Eldest Fairy
Another Hat!
Big Sticks
Lunacy at Washa's Bluff
Campout with Kass
BLOODY UNWATCHED POT
Errands in Zorana
A Game More Dangerous
Only those who have walked through the desert
The Missing Moldugas
POCKY QUEST
Like Prayer Flags in the Wind
Another Maze
The Desert Colossi
Lanayru Road
The Erhu Profane
The Lamb
On The Joys Of Mountaineering
The Least Dangerous Game
The Rigours of Horsemanship
When Lightning Strikes
The Entry For Which I Do Not Apologize
Beachfront Shenanigans
Deep Smit
The Mysterious Palmorae Disc
Faron's Five-Cent Tour
Return to Serenne
Huppenwoop
A Matter of Presence
TO HEBRA!
The Fleeting Career of Mr. Jingles
It's Barbaric Out There
SNOW DAY
SNOW DAY 2: THE ADVENTURE CONTINUES
SNOW DAY 3: WRESTING THE BEST ERE THE QUEST TO THE WEST
Clean Up Your Room and Go To Bed, Hero
Ruins and Remnants
Definitely Not Girl Stuff
To The Glistening Eastern Sea
BIG BOYS
Shrine for a Rainy Day
High Hopes . . . Bogged
In The Rain
Korok Trials
The Black Stallion
The Princess Irate
The Last Frontier
Rito Village
Wise Old Owl
Brazen Peacock
The Hunt for Red Lizalfos
Basecamp
WHERE THE MEN ARE FINE ARCHERS
Divine Beast Vah Medoh
Owa Daim Elusive
Revali's Gale
Safe Roost
And the Women Better Singers
The Mirror in the Music
The Windy Canyon
Seven Prayers
Aquas and LousySpy and the Monster Born Of Darkness
But I Like The Red Rocks
No Tarryin' for Tarrey!
A Monstrous Interlude
In Accordance with Guidelines
Kass' Promise
The Weapon Connoisseur
The Princess is a Nerd
On the Devil's Doorstep
Castle Goods, COD
More Loose Ends
Just Ends
Return To The Castle
Privy Thoughts
The Princess and the King
Dark Ascent
Exhale
The Entry With No Shrines
Impa's Final Message
What Garill Knew
The Day The Hero Fell
Before The Storm
Running
Clean Up The City
WEST SIDE
Shouldn't It Stand To Reason?
Maybe the Front Porch
Last Corners
Rhoam's Gift
Demons, and Nightmares, Endai In Between
Fire and Flurry
Pictures of the Past
Journal Of Two Very Specific Worries In Particular
Sleepwalker
Corruption and Innocence
Shrine Out Of Time 1 - Relent
Shrine Out Of Time 1.2 - One Day In Kakariko
Gear Out Of Time - The Knight Proper
Shrine Out Of Time 2 - Grace Under Pressure
Shrine Out Of Time 2.2 - The Last Shrine
Shrine Out Of Time 2.3 - Gifts
Privy Thoughts Again
The Abomination
CALAMITY
The Promise Of Ages
Never The End
And that has made all the difference.
And that has made all the difference....