The Entry With No Point

Evening of Friday, January 5, 2018

The Entry With No Point

Chasing Koroks sufficed to wear my Flameblade down to nothing until it broke, whereupon I could finally raid the Silver Bokoblin’s treasure chest—a Knight’s Claymore, I think. A fine weapon. Though I do like the one-handed blades.... they are faster. I feel like I can never find enough of those....

Back at the Riverside Stable I took out Brown and rode him all the way back to the Gerudo Canyon Stable.

I thought it miraculous that no one called for rescue along the way.

And we galloped right past the Hinox—I’d been tiptoeing round him up ‘til then. We were too fast for him to give us any trouble, and when we stopped to look behind, it was only to see him flop enormously back onto the ground for another nap. David and I chuckled....

In Gerudo Canyon I finally caved to the sidequest and decided I would gather rushrooms for that old man—Pirou was his name.

The rushrooms were plentiful near the stable, but it wasn’t too much of a chore to find a few more higher up. My climbing for them took me all over, right up to where I swear I’d been before, just before I came to The Tallest Tower.

I was quite high up by the time I’d collected at least fifty-six of them (the old man wanted fifty-five, but I wanted to keep my inventory oriented as it was). And from my altitude I could see a strange little rash of vegetation across the canyon, the green stark against the beige, on one of the great shelves of land leading up to the Wasteland Tower.

Baobabs.

The distance was vast but I managed to paraglide to the shelf just shy of the little copse, and then climbed up to see what I could see.

And what I saw was Guardians—

Paused and switched the sensor to detect Decayed Guardians—

....

Nothing.

There was no beeping.

These Guardians were truly dead.

I was safe.

Or was I?—there was movement over there—

But it was only a Lizalfos.

That was easy enough to deal with; on went my mask and I hunched over, head twitching and bird-like.

But I quickly found that even Kilton’s handiwork wasn’t enough to protect me from the blasted penetrating curiosity of a baddie..... when that baddie was an Electric Lizalfos.

It came close and when its sputtering, fritzing, zapping horn touched me—

Well it hurt more than my feelings, I’ll tell you that.

And so trying to avoid all the friendly advances, in the guise of a lizard I salvaged all I could from the remains of the dead Guardians—and one of them gave me gears!

Excellent.

I wanted to explore further—I even managed to kill one or two of the Electric Lizalfos, and there was a small troop of Moblins further up the hill I wanted to visit, but.... when the Blood Moon started coming on.... I decided it was probably better that I just go. I had the old man’s rushrooms; it was time to paraglide back.

The midnight vision happened to strike me in mid-flight, almost directly above the stable.

It’s strange, when you’re up in the air and well away from anything and thus assured in the knowledge that you are safe.... and yet when all that air around you turns so vivid blood red....

I enjoyed the novelty of the occurrence but it was a little like floating tiny and alone and naked under the gaze of Sauron.

When the vision had passed, I quickly dropped altitude and gave Pirou his blasted rushrooms.

Fifty-five bleedin’ rushrooms they take too long to gather....

And Pirou gave me a diamond in return.

....

Well I guess that was.... swell of him.

Not worth it.

KAAM YA'TAK

Waking of Saturday, April 22, 2017 ~ 4

KAAM YA’TAK

The right fork of the river had been a dead end.

Drats!

I found some land to climb back up, and head back to the split above the little waterfall. The place where the bokoblins camped.

My old raft was gone.

DOUBLE drats!

But no matter, I could follow the left split of the river on foot. And I did.

Oh gosh I was covering so much ground so fast—gads it all kind of blurs together.... But with David’s guidance, and to generally increasing amusement at my sleep-deprivation.... I think this was where he steered me into the Shrine of Kaam Ya’Tak.

The Trial of Power.

What a racket was going on in that place....

“Tired is the Mormon drunk,” a friend once said to me, and I think I agreed.

I don’t know what inebriation feels like, but I’ve certainly tasted that special kind of loopy you get when you’ve missed a few REM cycles.

I don’t know why that shrine took me so long.

I don’t know how I even survived in there. Feeling so cautious and wary of crawlies and yet moving and acting on ahead with the abandon of the invincible. As if there wasn’t a deadly abyss right behind me as I skirted round a giant morningstar held off by shaky Magnesis....

And when David told me to look at the floor....

“What, that teeter-totter?” I asked.

“Yeah.”

There was a trapdoor spanning the corridor I had to move through.

“I died right there when I was in here.”

“Oh. Thanks!” I said, happy for the tip. ^__^

Poor David just must not have been running fast enough when he crossed it, I thought.

I backed up for speed, started running and took a flying leap onto it—

“What are you doing??” David gasped.

It tilted much faster than I’d thought it would! But I just kept jumping and my second footfall barely made it to the other side of the fulcrum and.... well I made it.

“Or you could just Stasis it!” he said.

“....Oh.”

I was also paranoid when I didn’t have to be—“What kind of Pokémon is that?” I asked when I saw a spinning kind of pedestal in the distance....

“Oh my gosh, you’ve seen it before,” said David.

“I think I’d remember seeing that before....”

“You know, the Apparatus thing?”

“The Myahm Agana Apparatus?”

“Whatever!”

“No....” I was positive if I got too close it would shoot lasers at me for sure.

But it didn’t. It was just an interface. And I used it to control a giant hammer to knock stuff around!

There were an awful lot of weapons hiding in chests in this shrine. And David kept making fun of me for agonizing over which weapons I should drop to make the trades.... I wasn’t going to give up my Korok Leaf! I did have a Traveler’s Sword, brand new but very weak—I’d been meaning to bring it back to somebody in Hateno who’d wanted one.... Ugh but I finally just let it go—I’d find another one later. Its final act was to fly through the air and slice the rope that held a flaming lantern above a floor littered with dry leaves.... the ensuing flames spread so astonishingly fast I almost didn’t notice the huge stone ball that nearly ran me over.... But at least I’d made my peace with discarding a weapon!

There were four treasure chests in there that gave me this fit—not to mention the weapons dropped by the Guardian Scouts—and David laughed every time.

“How much damage does your strongest weapon do?” he asked.

I thought of my Lucky Number 38—the Knight’s Claymore I believe it was called.

“Thirty-eight,” I said.

He rolled his eyes so hard he must have seen his own brain. “Thirty-eight?” he chewed in a haughty drawl.

I only grinned a glare at him.

He didn’t tell me his maximum damage.

I preferred it that way.

I did find a two-handed sword in that shrine that dealt fifty damage—handy! I used it to kill two Guardian Scouts in four strokes.

Because David had said those kinds of Guardians had a hundred hit points each.

I hadn’t known that—how had he?

Maybe he sneaked one of my amiibos....

(Yes, I have amiibos but I’m doing my first playthrough sans any extra helps.)

(Except the DLCs dang you, Nintendo....)

SOMEHOW—

SOMEHOW I CAME TO THE END.

I came to Kaam Ya’Tak, high on a platform above the giant rat race.

“YOU DID THIS TO ME,” I growled at him, and David laughed.

No, no, I tried to be nice, keep my head in the game, now—oh my gosh I was so low on sleep—

This was the best and worst shrine ever at the same time—

I collected his Spirit Orb, exited the shrine, and saw to my deepest distress—

“Oh my gosh!”

“What!” said David.

“There’s an aspen wood! Next to a body of water! With rocks in it! And the Dueling Peaks in the background!”

“You haven’t gotten that one yet?”

“NOOO!” I turned and ran in the opposite direction.

I had to find Mei.

Errand Boy

Waking of Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Errand Boy

The unholy smoke started curling from the ground, and I began to sprint up the stairs, accidentally chasing a poor hapless fox up in front of me. There was a bed up on top of the Reservoir wall, and I really wanted to sleep in it before the Blood Moon shone—

I was five feet from it when the final crash of darkness sounded, and the Princess’ voice warned me to once again please be careful.

Oh but I was being careful, I thought as I came back to myself. I was going to have a good long sleep in this bed. You see because I wasn’t feeling very well, because a Hinox had fallen on top of me.

The rest I had until the morning was most welcome....

Earlier, I had paraglided down from Vah Ruta’s high spring and begun combing the Domain once more for those historical tablets, only becoming distracted by the other Zoras’ issues once or twice.... or thrice.... along the way.

I found a few new tablets, with some interesting and informative histories on them! But there were still a few more, somewhere waiting out there. Jiahto offered to tell me where some of them were, but I told him it was okay; I’d find them.

In fact, I was finding quite a lot in my searchings, including more luminous stones. But Ledo was still sleeping when I came back to him again.

One of Mei’s and Fronk’s children, Tumbo, was selling frogs to raise money while his mother was.... not working, so I donated some of my Hot-Footed Frogs to him. And in the square by the fountain, one Zora child named Keye, while at play, unintentionally gave me a helpful hint about the pedestal at Veiled Falls—perhaps I should try thrusting the trident into the pedestal.

Well, I tried it, with Mipha’s Lightscale Trident, which I had been loathe to actually use. But nothing happened. And now the Lightscale Trident doesn’t have its pristine luster in my inventory anymore. However, Dento assured me that I could come to him if it ever broke, and he could remake it for me. He’s handy in a workshop, that one.

But I’m still not sure if I’ve ever seen the Ceremonial Trident Trello keeps talking about; he said he dropped it somewhere under a bridge....

Guess I’ll just keep looking.

From Veiled Falls.... well, I was close enough to Ralis Pond to go try and have a go at Torfeau’s Hinox.... so I goed.

It was Torfeau who had asked me if I would try and kill it.

Of course it had been Torfeau. She’s the one always practicing with her spear, the first Zora I had seen wearing armor. Tula and Tona were only concerned with their Prince Sidon Fanclubbery.

Well, it started with the letter T anyway.

I drank a sneaky elixir and crept up to the big sleeping Hinox, my heart thumping madly, thinking maybe I could crawl on top of it to steal things off its necklace. And I did come quite close to it. Right next to it, touching it, even walking into it in fact. But I could gain no purchase to climb.

Instead, I thought Oh just blow it and began hacking at it with my Special Thirty-Eight Big Stick. It got to its feet....

Never hack the legs out from under a Hinox at close quarters.

You will regret it.

After a narrow escape and a good long rest and for my second attempt at the Hinox.... I just took David’s approach. Which, honestly, was kind of my approach too, or it would have been if I’d engaged a Hinox before now. It was a good approach—why would I think to go and start attacking one directly? In reach of its—oh Farore they’re so ugly....

Instead! I speared up through the Veiled Falls, made my way to the clifftop above Ralis Pond, and invoked the beautiful aid of Ja Baij.

Of course, the bombs were slow, and the great brute kept wandering—didn’t have a clue who was pelting it with tiny explosives. And so I switched to arrows. A bit faster, and more damaging, so that in a few moments.... I had slain my very first Hinox.

Felt good to clear up Ralis Pond of that filth.

Ralis....

There was a name I respected.

When I finally caught Ledo awake and at his work, I gave him the ten luminous stones. He made a great and humorous fuss about counting them all out—and then he rewarded me with diamonds.

Oh my, but I must look into what those could be used for, or how much they could be sold for—

I might finally claim that house in Hateno Village to be.... a home for me....

Ledo invited me to bring him any more luminous stones I might find, though he said any other sets of ten he’d only trade me one diamond for, not two.

Well that was fine with me! C8

I had eleven more on me just then, but....

Yes I should like to research this.

AND THEN SOME

Waking of Saturday, March 18, 2017 ~ 12

AND THEN SOME

I’m sorry to say that David and I kind of giggled irreverently at the placement of the final map marker. Well, we supposed it was near the end of the dungeon after all.

It was one more long, slow walk down the middle of the floor as I approached the terminal at the far end. I watched the time as I went; it was nearing midnight. I stepped in front of the pedestal just on the stroke of twelve, and held out my Sheikah Slate. But just before I made contact, a dark force repelled me, and then coalesced in the center of the room into a hideous, grotesque creature, seemingly composed of the same black-and-purple substance I’d seen all over the Divine Beast. Long, gangling—did it have legs? I only remember its cruel, spidery arms, one of them wielding an enormous blade of blue light. A dark red mane ran down its neck and spine.

This was Waterblight Ganon.

This was the thing that had murdered Lady Mipha.

For a time I shot him with arrows from behind the great pedestal while he cast his magical spear at me repeatedly—it rematerialized in his grasp every time.

Moblin’s Magic Spear, I thought ridiculously.

But my arrows weren’t doing enough damage. “I can’t keep this up,” I said. I’d have to face him directly. The biggest stick I had was a double-edged blade that dealt 38 damage a blow. I equipped it, and ran at him—

But he took offense at the strokes I dealt, and began to flood the chamber. It had been full of ankle-deep water before, but now.... there was nowhere to stand but on four isolated raised platforms.

He started casting huge blocks of ice at me, just as Vah Ruta had done. They were easy enough to dodge.... sort of. At times they knocked me into the water—they hurt me. And it was so slow to swim back and get back on my feet—

“Use Cryonis!” said David.

But would it work?

I aimed my Slate at the next volley of ice blocks—and I could break them.

And I felt like a FOOL for wasting so many arrows outside with the Prince!

Mipha’s voice came dimly into my mind: If only the ice could be used as a weapon.

“Try Stasis!” said David at the same time I thought it—

I shattered all but one of the demon’s next volley, and then stopped the last one in its tracks just before it collided with me. I hammered it four times with my Special 38 before the Stasis broke, and the stored kinetic energy hurtled it back into the beast and wounded him considerably! He sagged into the water, hanging onto one of the pillars for support.

And as he floated dead in the water there I took out my arrows once more and shot the blazes out of him—and this time they had a much greater effect. Flame Arrows I shot at him, all I had, which was about ten, as well as the one Bomb Arrow I had ever seen in my life—the explosion rocked the room.... “Die, die, DIE, DIE, YOU PUTRID—” I shouted at him, reveling in the volume I could attain with no sleepers in the house—

The monster was very weak by the time he regained himself in a last wind—he cast ice at me again, and again I shattered them all but one, and hurled that one back in his face, and that one did it. That one finished him.

Oh the ungodly screams and cries that issued from this.... abomination.... as it writhed and curled and melted and evaporated into oblivion—it was grotesque....

I wished it would die faster.

Even the thing that had killed Lady Mipha.