The Piano's Rival

Waking of Saturday, June 2, 2018

The Piano’s Rival

David was with me when I started up in Kakariko!

He’s always so far ahead but now I would show him something he’d never seen or done before!

Maybe a few things! :D

Those Guardians would have come back after the Blood Moon—I went out back and approached the one in the Pit. And when I paraglided down to the little hilly rockpile, below the line of safe escape, facing the monstrosity even as it glowed hot angry pink and lasered in to take careful aim at my heart and the Piano pounded indignation at this brazen affront.... David could not believe what I was doing.

BUT I HELD MY GROUND!

Careful now.... CAREFUL NOW....

“What are you doing?” David gasped.

The targeting laser steadied, the Guardian beeped.... beeped....

....

. . . . . . .

BEEPED . . . . . . .

. . . . . . .

It always took longer than you thought or wanted . . . .

But it was not until the FLASH—and absolutely no later than its first shining—that I swung my shield as the blue-white bolt of death-made-light came streaking in an instant up the field!

KHING!

And the satisfying slow-down so that I could see the reflected bolt almost frozen in the air, bounced back, its trajectory sure....

“Whaaaat?” said David.

And the normal flow of time resumed and the Guardian took the hit in the face!

“WHAAAT?” said David.

And then, riding over the deadly triplitive Piano came a swell of Strings, shining against the terror, just for a moment. At each successful hit they came back, breathing cool strength into the sound. The Guardians were not the only terrors to be reckoned with on this earth!

And this time, my Perfect Parry really was perfect. And in three hits.... the Guardian was down.

MAN THAT FELT SO GOOD! As I sailed down to collect all the bits left behind! So many gears! ^_^ So cool.

And what was more.... when I checked my inventory.... MY SHIELD WAS STILL SPARKLY!! 8D I’d come in with a new shield—and the Perfect Parry had upheld its quality, prolonged its life!

AWESOME! XD

I climbed up over the PitGate to see if I could sneak up on the other.... and we saw it creeping around below, quite close to the vertical rockface. I paraglided down.... and landed on its head.

“David! Look!”

The Guardian continued to crawl around, flicking its juddering, hundred-year-old gaze over the grass. Evidently it didn’t know I was there.

But every time it started and turned and started again, I had to readjust my footing on top of its can-head, even as Link bent slightly in that spring-ready stance he takes whenever an enemy is near....

Got kinda tricky when the Guardian wouldn’t get away from the wall, and started tipping....

Oh my gosh.... XD

I hopped down at some point and tried to have it out proper with this one too, but—

Well, my practice wasn’t perfect yet.

In the rolling confusion of close fire I warped away to the Wetland Stable....

That one was close enough to the Honeydell....

Turning the Tables

Waking of Thursday, May 31, 2018 ~ 2

Turning the Tables

Many, many moons ago, before any moons I could remember, before moons were moons, I hurried with a shake from the cold and entered into the Keh Namut Shrine, high on the Great Plateau, and found myself face to face with a three-legged devil terror that wanted to kill me.

It was only the second Guardian I had ever faced, the first having appeared before me in the Shrine of Oman Au.

But in engaging that second one.... somehow....

....Somehow I blocked that one with my shield and learned something called the Perfect Parry.

Hopefully I’ll be able to employ this more purposefully in the future....

That was it....

I checked my list of skills. It was actually called the Perfect Guard, but I think I preferred the alliteration.

That was it. That was what I was remembering.

I.... had never taken the time to finesse my swordplay—I’d always imagined I would, in the future, at some point....

But I never had.

But now....

Well I wanted to show David something but he wasn’t coming and I dared not do anything important in the meanwhile but I could go hunting because I needed those gears for the Ancient Cuirass—

AND I WAS GOING TO PLAY THIS GAME FOR THE PRESENT ANYWAY.

I needed gears. And only Guardians had gears.

So....

Up to my aid came the memory of an accidental parry, and....

I wanted to test it.

I wanted to try doing it on purpose.

Perhaps it had only been foolish to think of making the attempt in the middle of that basement full of nightmares, but.... where could I....?

I knew.

Back to Robbie’s place—The Decayed Guardian down the hill would suffice for the experiment. I floated down to say hello....

I.... stood my ground.... and held my shield....

No was it a two-handed weapon in my grasp? What was I doing—Daruk’s protection wore thinner....

I had come in too fast without a plan—And then as I could not take much more I made a dash for the other side of the stone, falling shamefully back to a panicked mashing of buttons.... I was Z-targeting, but I was facing away. The blast came. Daruk roared again.

But—

....

And the Guardian died?

How had—?

Was it because the shield had been on my back?

That happened to me in Majora’s Mask.

But if the shield were not actually deployed (for it was a Guardian shield)....

....

This needed more practice.

I collected the Guardian’s remains—there were no gears.

Cheapskate.

I was out of Ancient Arrows anyway. I didn’t want to go charging up against any more Guardians, decayed or not, without some backup. So it was back to Robbie’s again, where I bought ten more arrows. But I only had eighteen or nineteen gears. Not enough for the Cuirass.

Soon.... VERY SOON....

I warped to Kakariko Village—there were a couple more fairly manageable Guardians near there. I wanted to see if I could get more gears, continue practicing the Perfect Parry and, if need be, put my new arrows to use.

Oh my gosh I was hunting Guardians.

My first target was that one in the pit out back, at the top of the Sahasra Slope.

That first live one I’d ever seen....

Where was this Courage coming from?

....

I guess.... the lightning strikes near you often enough, and makes the earth to shake....

At some point you just stop trembling.

....

But you try not to get struck nonetheless.

My timing was very much off, and I lost my footing in the fireballs. One laserbolt destroyed my Guardian Shield and I had to switch to a Knight’s Shield—It wasn’t Ancient Tech; would it work the same?

This was a dangerous skill to practice; there was no padded training arena for this. But Daruk protected me. And Mipha kept watch.

I managed to take the Pit Guardian down using only the Perfect Parry followed up with normal arrows to its eye.

I slew a Guardian without an Ancient Arrow.

And the second one just through the PitGate and out on the grass was almost as manageable! But, as Daruk became exhausted with my poor sense of timing—and, as I also lost my Knight’s Shield to a laserbolt—I did use an Ancient Arrow to finish that one off.

Two Guardians with one Arrow. Heh.

I made one last stop at Cotera’s to see if there were anything I could upgrade—turned out there were—I bumped up the defense on some of my Circlets.

And then it was back to Robbie’s once again because those two Guardians out back of Kakariko had bumped me up to twenty-four gears!

I HAD ENOUGH GEARS FOR THE CUIRASS!

AND CHERRY MADE IT FOR ME!

KhuAGH! My wallet!  >⩄<

But it didn’t matter—I had enough rupees—and now I had two of the three pieces of armor that would defend me from my deepest nightmares!

DANG it, Nintendo! I said it before! Why do they do this!

The only way to acquire the thing that would make your most dreaded trial more bearable.... is to first complete your most dreaded trial without it! OH you cruel ironic building my character so I can—hrrmph!

Back to Cotera’s and I upgraded my new Cuirass, for there were no gears required for the first level. Plenty of lesser parts, but I had enough of those to spare.

There were gears required for the second level of upgrades: ten gears per piece for the Ancient Armor set. I assumed it would be the same case with the Ancient Greaves. After the twenty gears it would cost me to acquire those in the first place....

These things were so expensive.... and not just in rupees.

But.... I was getting better.

Soon I would become better still.

A Blood Moon rose as I ran around Cotera’s forest.

More gears would be ready and waiting for me to collect them.

SOON.

I just needed a few more shields. Mine were running out pretty quick.

Further Distraction

Waking of Sunday, November 26, 2017

Further Distraction

I went out onto the Sahasra Slope. There had recently been a Blood Moon.

It was time to hunt Guardians.

The one in the gorge—that first terrible moving one I had ever seen—went down without a hitch. Something even happened as I sported with it on the rocky slope—it momentarily tipped over backward, so that I could see a glowing orb of some kind set into its underside—a weak spot?

I would have to research that further.

....Research. What a laughable euphemism.

The second one, across the gorge, was a little more frightening, but I was able to take it down just the same. My Ancient Gear collection was mounting up....!

The third one back toward the village however.... Night was falling just as I engaged that one, and some Stalcreatures burst out of the earth at precisely the wrong moment.

I lost an Ancient Arrow.

And the Guardian was hammering me—

I warped back to Kakariko. Blasted Stalkoblins!

No....

No, it was another case of lack of situational awareness, that’s what it was.

I looked up from the shrine’s warp pad, and saw a familiar canvas peeping between the peaks across the valley.

Kilton was back.

I ran and sailed and climbed my way over to him, and first snapped his pictograph—that soldier from the East Akkala Stable wanted to have that.

But I realized the picture was only of Kilton’s back, and the beak-like tatter of his hood. So I drew his attention so that he turned around, and snapped another pictograph.

The quest-exclamation-mark was still affixed to the back-picture in my album, though. Hm.

Eh, whatever.

Kilton had some new wares for me to look at—a Lizalfos Mask.... and a Monster Saddle and Monster Bridle. OuO

I was more careful with my Mon-accruing this time, trading easily replaceable monster bits for just enough currency to pay for those three items.

Heh, the Lizalfos Mask is great. My head twitches just like a bird’s. XD

But I also wanted to see how that new tack looked!

Wanting to keep to the road, I only warped to the Dueling Peaks Stable, wondering if perhaps I could change tack there.

It was raining when I arrived. Hino griped to me that he couldn’t see the moon in this weather. But what was more, everyone was inside! I couldn’t ask anyone about my horse’s gear.

So I warped on ahead to the Outskirt Stable; the weather was clear there.

I had the girl put the Monster Tack on Thrice. (I was sure he’d be okay with it. He’s been around Bokoblins before after all.)

It looked wicked! OuO XD

Tattered and ragged, patched and uneven, homespun as if by spiders from a forgotten cave on Halloween night.... with scary polo wraps to match! C8

It was cool! XD

And Thrice’s entire head was covered—except for one ear, I think—and he had those bulging mesh eye-covers—and mean-looking kind of plates down the back of his neck—it looked so scary! XD

Hah, I’d love to see David’s reaction when he sees me riding with that gear! ^_^

The Most Dangerous Game

Afternoon of Tuesday, September 19, 2017 ~ 2

The Most Dangerous Game

Out back of Kakariko on the Sahasra Slope, before I met the Bokoblins, I actually took a detour over toward the west. The very first Guardian Stalker I’d ever met was over there, safely down in a dell where it couldn’t reach me. And now I was armed with Ancient Arrows, and a little more experience.

I once again practiced my aim with a few normal arrows before shooting off an Ancient one; and again the Guardian’s life meter emptied in a heartbeat, as it shook and rumbled and collapsed and exploded to the ground.

And it left me Ancient Gears! 8D Why, if I could harvest these Guardians all right.... I’d be well on my way to a set of Ancient Armor!

WHY do Zelda games DO that???  8C

You want the item that makes Terrible Thing easy! Or easier. But the only way to GET said item is to do the Terrible Thing without its help! So that once you acquire the item, the item which would make the Terrible Thing more bearable—YOU ARE NO LONGER DAUNTED.

RURGH it is a WICKEDLY devious method of conveyance for the life lesson that you don’t need the magic feather.

BLAST THEIR MAD GENIUS.

Where the heck was I?

I was killing a Guardian.

I killed the Guardian, collected its spare parts, and ventured down into the dell. I was sure one of the big boulders down there was a Talus. The place was too rocky and open to not be a stage for a boss fight. But none of the boulders I jumped on jumped back at me.

At least, not until I was done exploring and accidentally jumped on just the right one on my way back out of the dell.

And this one was tricky in that its vulnerable protrusion of ore was situated somewhere down near its butt. It stuck out from a surface upon which I could not maintain a footing. I did the best I could with leaping blows from above and below, and eventually the brute went down.

I would have gone straight back to the slope to test out the mask on the Bokoblins after that, but I was further surprised by another Guardian. Another Guardian Stalker creeping around near where the first one had been. Out of the dell this time.

You know, in hindsight, I really should have marked my map with their locations.

Fortunately, habit saved my skin: I was once again keeping to the high ground, and on my grassy upper shelf I hugged the mountain tightly to keep out of the second Guardian’s line of sight.

But somehow, many paces later as I came near the road back into Kakariko again.... the needle red laser found me, the Piano threw a fit, and that Guardian Stalker was coming for me.

I turned to face it, jogged a little away from the cliff. Kept my feet moving.

It still walked as its targeting laser bored into my shirt. Just coming right up to me.

I kept moving—the laser beeped—I dashed to the left.

I had never dodged one of their attacks on foot before.

Leastways not without some cover.

But I saw the blue bolt shoot past me away on the right as I ran away from it, a perpendicular course.

Had I been in some magical Goldilocks Zone of the Guardian’s range? Not yet crossed the deadly event horizon of its targeting laser acquisition speed?

The outside of a record spins faster.

I didn’t think about it. I just nocked an arrow as the Guardian drew closer.

Did I even have time to practice with a normal arrow?

Yes.... yes I think I did make it stutter with a hit to its eye.

And then the Ancient Arrow.... and the Guardian crumbled and rolled down the hill. And I ran to collect its sprawling spare parts. More gears....

I killed a Guardian on open ground.

Just me and him. And I came out on top.

I could kill Guardians.

After I went and sported with the Bokoblins in my mask, I warped to Robbie’s. I was over budget on gears now. That Ancient Cuirass was as good as mine.

But as I looked at Cherry’s wares, I considered. Items of clothing for some parts of the body have a generally higher defense than those for others. Some items of clothing come with special perks. I had come seeking the Ancient Cuirass, but.... would that really be the best choice?

I also considered what materials were required for Cherry to make me more Ancient Arrows. Because I was definitely going to be wanting more of those in the future. Ancient Shafts.... What was my budget there?

It’s tough to go shopping when there are so many different flavors of what can act as currency, and the arrays of what they can purchase so varied and yet overlapping.

In the end the most economical and perk-preserving choice seemed to be the Ancient Helm. The Champion’s Tunic was still quite strong, and it granted me the ability to see my enemies’ life meters. Some Ancient Shafts were required for the Helm’s construction, but not so many that I couldn’t put the balance of what I had toward the purchase of five more Ancient Arrows, for the bulk-discount price of *cough* four hundred rupees. @_@

Eric Sorenson would be proud at least.  :|

Heh, the helm looked.... unearthly! My eyes were covered.

Actually it looked like—

“Hey, I look like a Shrine!” I said to David. ^_^

The top of the helm did come up in that distinctive shape. And the bottom fringe had bright blue little circles all around it, with a slightly more prominent one front and center where my eyes would have been. My hair hung loose in a shaggy golden mane, longer than I’d thought it was.

Actually I thought it looked kinda cool. XD

And so after that it was a warp to the Lomei Labyrinth, a paraglide over the court, and a quick dash into what I believe was the selfsame hole I had hidden in last time.

The Piano heralded the Guardian’s approach, and I let it draw near, and took it down just the same. More gears.

That was my original four Ancient Arrows spent. Five fresh ones left.

As long as I was on a roll, I decided to press my luck, warp to the Akkala Tower, and attempt to take on.... a Flyer.

It was pouring freezing rain when I got there.

I switched to my Warm Doublet, and considered the encircling fiends.... One Flyer’s patrol took it time and again to the dead end of one lonely turret of land that stuck out toward Zorana. Some forgotten bastion with a few crumbling ruins on it—and a few trees for cover. I’d try that one.

I leapt from the tower and paraglided over the Flyer, briefly wondering what would happen if I just dropped down on top of it....

Eh, another time.

I headed for the little row of trees and waited for it to come back.

Rusted cannons still stood faithfully in the pouring rain.

Uh.

It’s a special kind of dread, getting ready to make yourself seen....

The Flyer came back and just got hoppin’ mad when it saw me. When it drew near I took a few desperate practice shots, but the angle was difficult, and the Flyer was too close for me to dodge its first blast. Took out more than half my hearts. But I got up again and nailed the thing with an Ancient Arrow....!

And its life meter only half emptied.

Already it was finding me again, charging up—oh dear.

Mipha had to come to my aid before I was able to hit it again and bring it down completely.

So it took two shots to kill a Flyer.

Well that was good to know.

And now I had three Ancient Arrows left....

....

Maybe in the future I’d just try to stick to the crawlers if I could help it.

Those arrows were expensive.

Grumblers

Waking of Saturday, March 11, 2017 ~ 2

Grumblers

Ledo had been most patient with me, but now it was time for me to move on. Sure I’d head up the river. But not before I stopped at that tower! It was very close and looked most accessible. Crawling and surrounded with enemies no doubt, but it was just at the top of a big hill! I could get there....

I ran back to the shallows and continued my way through the wetlands. It really started to pour along the way and, as I neared an island, I heard it—a muffled kind of moaning. Like a wheezing elephant.

I’d heard it once before on the Sahasra Slope. Actually it had reminded me of the deep, distorted thrumming of the Great Fairy before her power was restored. But.... it had felt different. I hadn’t sought it out then.

But now I could see what I believed to be the source of it, right in front of me on one of the bigger islets.

There amid a stand of trees was something huge and red, with white highlights, squatted on the grassy ground.

Another fairy-cocoon?

I watched it closely through the rainy haze, trying to make sense of its shape, until it scratched its nose.

Definitely not a fairy-cocoon.

It seemed to be lying on its back, sleeping I think.

Its skin was the same color as bokoblin- and moblin-skin.

Oh my gash. What—

I got out my pictograph box and took a long-distance shot, not daring to get closer.

A Hinox, my Sheikah Slate identified it as. The largest monster to call Hyrule home, it said.

Oh my.

....

Well, that was one sleeping dog I decided to let lie. Happy the rain was making such a din, I nonetheless crept quietly along the outskirts of the little islet until I came to another bridge that led away toward the hill with the tower.

The Storm

Waking of Friday, March 10, 2017 ~ 4

The Storm

I came to a land of many waters.

And they were shallow, and full of grass. A wetland.

And there was a Shrine. OH, Din Nayru and Farore if I could just get to it—!

I moved so slowly, so cautiously. Tried to but couldn’t avoid beating up some bokoblins I saw riding horses. I even stole one of their mounts for a spell. (Don’t tell Brown.)

But soon the transition from the slope down onto the wetland prevented me from bringing any kind of beast with me, and I had to paraglide.

There were Lizalfos down there, too!

And I—put them down easily!

Why these things were more my speed. Oh, I liked trading blows with them. REALLY good rumbles where I could truly say Let’s dance and then bash some skulls.

I made it to the Shrine, received the shaman’s Spirit Orb, and came out again.... and the weather began to take a blustery turn. And I heard thunder.

I remembered something I had heard Doctor Calip say.... about any metal objects one might have equipped. He said the lightning in Hyrule is notoriously attracted to metal objects—best to unequip them or just wait it out.

And so I hung back, and stood within the Shrine’s alcove, and watched the light show.

My gosh, strike, strike, strike—it knocked down trees. Again and again and again—it was so close—it was everywhere—

I had to wait quite a while.

Thank goodness for that Shrine.

WE GOT A LIVE ONE

Waking of Friday, March 10, 2017 ~ 3

WE GOT A LIVE ONE

Well, there was one other road that led away from Kakariko Village. But according to my map, it ended shortly thereafter, on Sahasra Slope.

I told Brown to stay in the village; I’d go out first to see if it was okay, and if it was, I’d come back and get him and we could go on together. My memories were out there somewhere, and we had to find them.

I’d blundered out this way once, when I was looking for Cottla or something.

It unsettled me then, and it did again now.

The seemingly endless downward slope combined with the tall, tall grass did not give an especially impressive view of what could be lurking in the distance, or even very close by. But eventually the land stopped folding in terrible convexity and I had some decent views.

There wasn’t much to speak of, just some wildlife, and, when the sun went down, some bokoblin skeletons.

I had just killed a couple of them, and leapt across a little ditch onto a rock to collect their remains, when some music started that I had not heard before.

“Oh what, what, WHAT—?” I spun about, trying to see if another rock-monster were coming after me.

But I couldn’t see anything.

I ran back the way I had come anyway, and the music swiftly faded away again.

Oh gads, what did it mean? D8

I thought of something Joseph—er, just another traveler on the road I’d like to think—said.... something about centaurs....

But there was nothing in sight.

Did I dare jump back onto that rock?

What in the world was there? I couldn’t see anything.

How did I see it, what did I do? What made me look—?

There was nothing across the rock or higher up that could see me—it was something below the cliff to my left—something that didn’t have a good view of me.

It was a six-legged-Guardian.

And it was very much alive and moving.

It didn’t look rusted or worn at all?

OH GADS WHAT WOULD I—

ARE YOU SERIOUS? D8

I JUST—

*!*

Okay, okay, okay. It was down there, and I was up here. It couldn’t see me right now.

I threw a bomb at it.

It must have taken damage, for the red health-bar appeared above it.

But throw as many bombs as I might, I couldn’t seem to even dent it.

And as the slow night crawled along, the honest thought passed through my brain that this game might be too scary for me.

Oh my gosh I couldn’t believe it.... a Zelda game? But I love Zelda games!

How could I not go on in a Zelda game over something scary?

Was that—

How could I—

....

.

.

.

Man.

I ran in the other direction.

To heck with that thing—the slope was wide; I’d just press on in another direction, and hopefully find some warpable I could lock down and thus ensure my expanding mobility.

A Proper Exploration

Waking of Tuesday, March 7, 2017

A Proper Exploration

You know, my map really was an intriguing thing to look at—I’m crazy for topo; probably get it from my dad—and the names of all these amazing places! The Cliffs of Quince.... Mount Lanayru.... the Sahasra Slope.... Oakle’s Navel? What the heck was that? XD

Maybe I had felt less agile on my horse. Even though he was good for making hasty getaways.

But I really did want to explore more.

And so leaving Brown safe in Hateno Village at “our” house, I excursed once ag—are you serious, Word? You’re not underlining that? That was just a guess; I didn’t know “excursion” had its own verb—this is really okay with you?

Goodness.

Where was I.

AND SO leaving Brown safe in Hateno Village at “our” house, I excursed once again out over the rolling hills of the high ridge.

I really wanted to explore the Cliffs of Quince. Brokka [Toma] and I had ridden beneath them on our long trek through the rain; they were huge, and hollow beneath, held up by gargantuan pillars and natural bridges. But I wanted to see what was on top....

It turned out to be a wide, pleasantly grassy plateau, though baddies crawled over it like lost ants.

My Iron Sledgehammer nearly died in battle against a moblin.

I’ll have to pick one of the other ones up soon.

I also saw a few large holes where the shelf of rock had worn through, and you could see down into the giant hollow where the bokoblins made their camp.

Some mushrooms were growing on the rock a little way down from the top.

I had never seen anything so not worth it in my life.

Other wanderings brought me to crags overlooking Fort Hateno.

I could see the advance the Guardians had made, and a chill settled into my stomach.

Ughuhuhh.... those things....

I even had a brief peak into Oakle’s Navel, though I did not explore it.

Once I’d had my fill of the immediate area, I decided that I couldn’t be afraid anymore.

I would leave Brown behind, and Travel back to the Dueling Peaks Stable via the local shrine’s warp platform, and I was going to travel the road as I should first have traveled it, as I had meant to travel it: with a fine-toothed comb.

There may have been shrines I missed!