HOTFOOTING IT

Waking of Saturday, August 12, 2017 ~ 2

HOTFOOTING IT

Perhaps it was that I had so recently finally consumed one of the Spicy Omelets in my inventory. Perhaps it was that I now had plenty of Fireproof Lizards in my pockets. Perhaps I just couldn’t take being called That guy who backed out of the endurance challenge.

Or maybe my shame had finally caught up with me for being such a dawdler.

I warped to the shrine in the desert near Digdogg Suspension Bridge, and hiked from there up into the mountain until I found Bayge, Heehl, Kabetta, and their giant molten hotplate of death.

I hopped up onto it, my clothes started to smoke, and Bayge’s cinematic wound up in an overdone countdown that had me juddering to hit the pause button and find that elixir!

Freedom of movement came soon enough. (Link’s overheated expression in the pause menu looked quite duressed!) I found the elixir, downed it, and returned to the game to find myself.... standing rather sedately on the glowing hot skillet, smoke no longer issuing from my person. That was nice.

I wondered if they’d give me fireproof clothing for beating this! I’d forgotten that it was actually a Shrine Challenge, and so was only slightly disappointed when Bayge called time and the thing rumbled up out of the earth.

The Gorons were all wowed and impressed anyway.

I beat the shrine, collected the Spirit Orb, and decided.... it had been long enough.

With a few more freshly-cooked Fireproof Elixirs in my pockets, I warped to the Eldin Tower.

Setting my face toward what appeared on my map to be the quickest road to Goron City, and what appeared before my face to be a random tangle of ash-slides and twisted rock, I stepped to the edge of the tower, and took a flying leap.

Fwoom! went the thermometer as smoke began billowing from my clothes again. And into the pause menu I went, downed another elixir, returned to the game.... and was safe in my silent glide into the inferno.

The time limit for the elixir’s effect ticked soundlessly away, gleaming unobtrusively in the upper left corner with all the innocence of the impending vacuum of space. The upper volcano was eerie. The glow of the lava so close and ash and lit cinders in the air.

But my boots soon hit the rock, and I was on a mission. I didn’t stop for Lizalfos. I didn’t stop for ore. I didn’t stop for critters.

I had to get to Goron City.

I tried to stay high and cut the corners of the path in my HUD map, capitalizing on the chance to cover distance by paraglider. And when my flight speed and altitude were spent, and I flushed down into the low road, I sprinted. I could only keep on hoofing it up the track.

And then of a sudden I burst through the midst of a gang of Gorons hard at work—the South Mine this place was called. I stopped to talk to a rather swarthy one in a hardhat, some kind of foreman or boss I gathered. The dialogue paused the timer, as I’d hoped it would. But I still didn’t catch his name; I felt too eager to continue.

The Goron simply expounded on what they were about, and how Vah Rudania, the Divine Beast, prevented them from accessing their other mining areas further into the mountain.

How interesting, I thought, and kept on running.

If I’d been feeling a bit more lax, I might have spent some time and thought wondering about the music. There was something.... very familiar about it here in the mining area, and further up the trail. Must’ve been a track I’d heard on a CD; it didn’t sound like it came from a game I owned....

And then Link came to a halt and shook as an awful roaring rent the air—

What about my timer?

The timer was gone. The screen faded instead to a much closer view of the Divine Beast Vah Rudania as it prowled around the cone of the volcano.

My gosh it was....

It was....

But how does one describe the cinematic passing of a Divine Beast, wherein every intricate detail, every curve and corner, every arch, rib and strut of its gleaming bronzy form is at last able to be glimpsed?

I already knew it was big.

....

The short cinematic ended and I kept on running. More and more bits of deliberate metalwork showed up, in archways, in fenceposts, in bridges. Gorons stood or walked here and there. I passed them. I could see the habitation drawing nearer in my HUD map. The name Goron City glowed across the screen. I could see the yellow dot indicating the one I was supposed to meet with. My fireproof timer was about to run out—

That big old stooped Goron was the one I needed to talk to—I ran into the town—Somehow reaching that point had become connected in my mind with the last crossing of this whole terrible bridge. Surely beyond that there would be some sort of fix, some sort of respite. Although.... there also might not be—I sprinted past rocky structures—What would I do when I had painted myself into a corner? What would I do when I had finished speaking with this elder Goron, and found myself in imminent danger of spontaneous combustion? Did I talk to the guy or—

WAIT.

Less than fifteen seconds.

My eyes darted to my HUD map. The building icons had populated.

Clothing shop, clothing shop.... There it was!

Less than ten seconds.

I ran inside, looked at the wares—600—700—2000 rupees—I had money.

Less than five seconds.

I bought them all and put them on—

And I was safe.

And I stood there as my timer ran out.

....

I looked like an old-timey scuba-diver.

....

. . . . . . .

Do you ever wonder if you’ve just made a big dumb purchase?

Procrastination

Waking of Saturday, July 29, 2017

Procrastination

I came out of the Tah Muhl Shrine and headed northeast to another shrine I had marked: the Sah Dahaj Shrine. This one lay in a deep hole beside a mad treehouse full of nasties. I cleaned them all out—after I completed the shrine.

Was it just me? Or did all these Eldin shrines contain fire-based trials? ¬.¬

I’d been picking up Koroks here and there, but THAT CIRCLE—that circle of stones behind the treehouse—for the life of me I could not find a spare stone ANYWHERE that would complete that circle and tease out the Korok!

I climbed all over the mountain above, and found nothing but more Fireproof Lizards—dandy for making more fireproof elixirs and made me wanna have another go at Bayge & Co.’s endurance challenge in the Gerudo Highlands but that wasn’t what I was looking for just now.

I even backtracked to another Korok I’d found hiding under a rock.... but that rock had long since vanished. Dang it.

I knew where there were more rocks.... somewhat nearby....

They were down in the shallow lake, near another Korok puzzle I’d solved: throw the rock in the water-goal.

Rocks for those kinds of Korok puzzles never run out.

There was only one problem: that lake was about a hundred feet lower than where the treehouse Korok Circle was—separated from it by terrain that was steep and ill-suited for walking. And walking.... was the only way to carry a rock for a Korok Circle. You couldn’t climb with those things.

....But those were the only rocks anywhere....

....

Yeah, I used one of those.

Yes, it was a chore.

No, the Octo Balloons weren’t that helpful—and I injured myself more than once.

Turned out I didn’t need them anyway.

NO I’M NOT TELLING.

ANYWAY!

I climbed a little more around the mountain—and found just one more Korok in a very frightening location, in a pool right next to a Guardian that patrolled back and forth along a section of road that passed beneath a delicate arch of stone.

Well, when the Guardian’s back was turned, I paraglided in and ran for it! I got to the little hot spring and ducked behind a large rock just in time.

It was tricky picking up that Korok—it was another rock-in-the-water-goal puzzle. I missed with the first rock I picked up—my nerves were on edge with that Guardian so close! But I got the second rock right where it should be.

I know when the Korok is interacting with you, the world of the game is frozen. But.... man, you still feel a pressure to hurry up when you’re on such dangerous ground!

I collected the Korok seed, started for the cover of the rock, and the Guardian saw me. It turned glowing hot red. “Oh man that thing’s agitated,” I muttered.

But it did not enter the spring to look for me.

Maybe they can’t walk on water.

I climbed a little more, started going up a pathway haunted by too many Fire Keese.... but, deciding I didn’t want to burst into flame anymore in the volcano’s heat, I hopped over the mountain’s arm and climbed into Akkala.

I came down almost right on top of the South Akkala Stable! I played some bug games with the stablehands there; they were cute. ^_^ After that I took the road north through a place I’d been curious about for a long time: Shadow Pass. I wondered what was in there....

Turned out it was just a lot of game. And of course all the beautiful Akkala plant life. <3

I also ran into a bear.

It growled at me, its eyes shining green in the moonlight....

I quickly jumped onto a big rock and climbed right to the top in a trice!

But the bear was already running out of sight.

Maybe we scared each other.

I continued north, looking for I don’t even know what....

I saw Karsh again. “Sav’saaba!”

I saw Chabi again. She’d heard Kilton was on the move now.

I basically just made a big circle, coming back toward the South Akkala Stable via the road that ran through the wetlands.

Those wetlands were another fine Valley of Terror, let me tell you. I set my detector once again to Decayed Guardians. And it chirped a foreboding beat....

I scavenged all the dead Guardians I dared, only backing off when I saw that I was nearing the live ones—I mean the ones that move. There are two of them down there. I’d seen them when I paraglided out of the Akkala Tower.

It was a fairly good haul anyway. Made me want to go visit Robbie again, and see what Cherry could make for me.

Back at the South Akkala Stable I met a guy whose dark skin was at odds with his platinum-blonde hair, and his name was Rex.

Rex said he was looking for that Legendary Sword. I chatted with him about it. He said he reckoned the sword was somewhere near the volcano.... but not on this side. He said it was probably closer to the Woodland Stable.

Huh.

You know.... I’d had a feeling about the Lost Woods for a long, long time.

When I chatted with Rex about it again, he became defensive, aggressive, saying he was going to be the one to find it! And I’d better just stay out of his way....

Huh.

....

Well now that my on-screen avatar had received a proper clue about it....

....

Well.... I do like chasing the scripted breadcrumbs.

Eh.

I took Memory from the South Akkala Stable, and rode him all the way to the Woodland Stable.

That.... was a pleasant ride.

And the Piano came out to accompany us, splashing in the wake of Memory’s hooves in its sunlit-raindrop song, and swaying and dipping its lovely Violin dance partner as they told us some of Koji Kondo’s best stories....

Zelda’s Lullaby.

The Legend of Zelda.

Beautiful themes.

I kept a sharp eye as we clipped along the riverside leading out of Lanayru.... and there she was, flailing away from a Bokoblin.

“Leekah.... Memory stay here,” I said as I dismounted....

When I’d escorted the disaster-prone girl back to the Woodland Stable, I checked up on Memory’s stats.... and saw that the last seven percent had finally filled up to max out our bond to each other.

He is willful, and wild.

And he is mine.

Somewhere around the stable I saw Laroba, another Gerudo. “Sav’aaq,” she hailed me, and then said something about where to find all the strapping voe.

Voe....?

....

I wondered if it was some concise term for boyfriend material.

I’d momentarily forgotten that the Gerudo couldn’t possibly find mates among themselves, as they are all women.

Hmm.

I wondered how they’d receive me once I ventured into their lands.

Well I ran up the hill to the Lost Woods and, more confident against wolves, even ventured inside a bit.

The mist was weird, curling in unnatural scud all across my view. The Piano came to heel again, tapping out once more those repetitive descending notes in a watchful key of G. It sounded more.... assertive this time, as though it knew there was something to be sought after hard in here.... though that may only have been my imagination.

I followed a few lit torches into the green misty gloom....

But....

I considered my surroundings. I mean my surroundings. In my house.

There were too many people around. The buzzkill risk was too high. And this seemed too important.

I didn’t want to do it right now.

I backed out.

But on my way I thought I saw something faintly glowing in the distance, something.... orange or pink....

I tried to climb a rock to get a better view and—

EVERYTHING WENT WHITE—and I swear I heard some.... someone.... laughing....

And I wound up back at the entrance.

....

Unlike Ketoh Wawai’s shrouded island.... it seemed the path in here.... could not be strayed from.

I came out and decided to climb north around the volcano.... looking for more shrines maybe. I found that epic treehouse I’d seen before [or rather what I thought was that epic treehouse I’d seen before—there’s a couple of them on Death Mountain’s western slopes], got up behind it, and cleared it out with an equally epic game of Bomb-Golf.

You know.... I really.... really love having infinite bombs in this game. =3

After I killed the treehouse.... well the volcano was just so massive....

What was I doing, anyway?

I changed course, and started to go after my blue marker instead. As far away as it was, it was probably closer than any north part of the volcano I thought about exploring—Death Mountain was huge.

I hiked west around the north side of the Lost Woods, getting quite close to the edge of my visible map. I could see the way to where I’d put my Blue Marker. It was so close!

But.... as I’d suspected, it did get too cold before I got there. Too cold even for my Warm Doublet. I could even see the boundary where the falling rain turned into falling snow.

I met a nice lady merchant walking along the road there. Yammo was her name. But she and her donkey didn’t have any cold weather clothing I could buy....

The two of them just kept walking toward the freezing air.... and a moose. A Tabantha Moose. I snapped its pictograph as its head was turned in my direction. It had the same green eyes as that bear had had....

When Yammo and her donkey got close to it, it spooked, which spooked them, and they all ran away from each other. XD

Well, the way up the road and toward my marker was too cold, but I could plainly see a shrine and a stable far away in the west, amid a grassier, gentler clime.

But.... I could also hear a shrine beeping much closer than that....

It was in that place I’d seen in the northern reaches of my Woodland Map. Those huge, huge angular structures in that low valley....

I wanted to find it....

Good Friends

Waking of Thursday, July 20, 2017

Good Friends

Good friends really are wonderful. Alison, Jenenne and Jenny came over and took me out for a burger to celebrate my birthday. They couldn’t do it on my actual birthday because.... it’s just been so busy at work.

It’s rough when for your birthday you gotta drive a longer commute, to a less sanitary building, with ventilation systems ill-designed for the desert environment, which don’t really work anyway, to sit in a smaller cubicle, at an earlier hour than usual, to do mandatory overtime.

It’s been some long and hard days. But....

Good friends really are wonderful.

After food they brought me back and we all wondered what to do next. “Games?” someone proposed.

And frankly I probably just panicked. Games like the kind you play at parties? Parties full of people, crowds make me nervous....

I don’t know when the last time I just plain.... played a game was. With other people. I know I used to. Lots of people. But....

When did it become so uncomfortable, so dangerous, in my mind?

That just someone saying the word Games could.... make me want to back out and run away.

And so I brought up something else that I had heard my friends express an interest in: “You guys want to see my Zelda game?”

“Ooh yeah!” said Jenny. I turned on the console.

Alison wanted to start her own game but when we came to the rigamarole of that she would have to create a profile on my WiiU first.... she told me to just go ahead.

Just for kicks I found my own way out of Ketoh Wawai’s shrouded island. Even remembered to turn my HUD back on halfway through, oops.

Our mission, I told them, was to Collect the Blue Marker and Find Mister Kilton.

And so we wandered west, toward my blue marker.... but it was quite far away. And zooming in with my scope, it looked like there might be a danger of my freezing to death before I could reach it.

Well.... not wanting to be all night, we decided to forego the blue marker for the present, and wander back east around the north of the volcano, toward Gut Check Rock, and Skull Lake.

But that was quite a long distance, too.

And so after looking at some wildlife—Alison enjoyed the cranes; she asked me to take a picture but I didn’t.... I should have—after looking at some wildlife I simply warped straight to Gut Check Rock.

From there I paraglided toward Skull Lake, found the highest jump-point I could and then paraglided again toward the shrine on the spire island. My friends were wowed by the vastness of the world! Jenny was right glued to the screen. And Alison was right glued to Jenenne’s snack she had brought: some kinda sticky-sweet puppy chow mix, which I tried to partake of carefully because I didn’t want to gum up my WiiU gamepad!

It was delicious.

“Here, take it away from me,” said Alison, and Jenny and I obliged.

The shrine was named for one Zuna Kai, but I don’t remember whether it was a puzzle shrine or a blessing shrine. Might have been a blessing shrine.... Yeah.

After that it was a slow float down all the shelfy rocks to find Kilton. There were so many crags to explore.... Killed a few baddies....

In the lake at the bottom there was a boat, and I showed my friends how to blow it around with a Korok Leaf! That was pretty cool. B)

I blew it the short distance to Kilton’s island....

And WAITED.

The water in the lake was full of giant flowers, submerged some feet beneath the surface. Made me wonder if there could be a fairy nearby....

Night fell, storms came and went (the foliage-obliterating lightning was quite transfixing!), and Kilton didn’t show.

After 2:00 am and with still no Kilton I jumped off the island and swam away for a distance. And then upon turning back—

BOOM! There’s a huge balloon of some kind parked there?? (Seemed I just had to step away so the game could populate it!) All in dark spooky colors in the patchwork of its envelope and the ramshackle tent beneath it.... at first glance it made me think of some Halloween-themed version of the Wizard of Oz!

I swam back!

After scrambling onto the island, I approached the figure moving behind the tent’s tiny counter.... He seemed.... bird-like in appearance—no it was the torn back of a hood—

I got his attention and he turned around and spooked and HOWLED at my appearance! And then he said, “Oh... just a Hylian.”

What.... was he? His face was huge, and grey-skinned. Actually I was reminded of nothing so much as.... oh let me check the spelling.... Ben Quadinaros. The Star Wars podracer whose power coupling failed at the start line. Quadinaros also had a huge face.

Kilton’s face was large, with pronouncedly curly eyebrows and very wide eyes. He asked me what I thought of monsters.

I told him the truth: “I hate them.”

And, looking very much, well, deflated, he cut off the conversation.

Oh dear. I.... kind of pitied his poor timid manner.

So I spoke to him again, and this time claimed, “I like them.”

He asked me how much I liked them.

There were four possible responses, and I only remember the most intense one: I ADORE THEM!

But I chose the lowest response.

Whereupon Kilton jumped into an overbearing pose and screamed, “I LOVE THEM MORE THAN YOU DO!”

o__o;

Guess he was.... anticipating a little bit of contention there. Guy gets excited! ^_^;;

But he apologized and quieted down and introduced himself properly and then rattled off the names of a few villages (some I’d never heard of!) that he might like to do business in in the future—at night.

And then.... he was on his way. Back in his balloon and off into the sky.

And that was Mister Kilton.

Well that encounter was.... shorter than I’d thought it would be. Seemed it was just an introduction, to get to know him.

Guess I’d see him around.

What even is he....? If not a Hylian.... I wonder....

Well, we’d completed our mission of Finding Mister Kilton, and so set about getting into what tomfoolery was readily available. I wandered....

From Skull Lake I wandered into Rok Woods, and quickly discovered it was not named for a giant bird, as I had wondered. I did however get a Korok for my.... heavily concussive troubles. And then I climbed up on one of the jutting rocks above Tempest Gulch. And after grabbing another Korok there, I considered the Blue Lynel prowling down near the aspens....

Under a bit of peer pressure from the ladies, I paraglided down and RODE IT! HAHA!

Wasn’t gonna let David one-up me entirely! ^_^

After it bucked me off, I had a fair tussle with it, too! I employed Stasis most effectively, but.... in the end it proved stronger than I was, and so I warped back to the Zuna Kai Shrine on top of the Skull Lake Spire, and then back to Gut Check Rock.

I showed them the cooking pot up near where Bayge sat, and after consulting my ingredients Alison insisted I should make a Speed Elixir. So I did, and they loved the cute little animation of Link cooking, just as they had loved the animation of him eating to up my hearts before I faced the Lynel. ^_^

But the Lynel had taken just as many hearts back off, and then some, and so it was a paraglide down to the hot spring for a nice, healing soak.

We ran around a bit more until we found.... a BLUE HINOX, snoring out there on the hot rocks. I moved in so they could see the creature up close, and got closer, and closer.... until the Hinox woke up, and then it was a comical run for our lives as it chased after us! XD

Ah it were such a delightful time just romping around on the screen. But....

Well, I was the Hero. And I had followed the breadcrumbs as far as I could. Perhaps not in a direct course, but hey, I was trying. Go see Impa. Go see Purah. Go see Robbie. Murmurs about Kilton.

And I’d found Kilton, and then he’d gone and—

There were no more breadcrumbs.

That was the end of the breadcrumbs.

....

But....

I was here at the Volcano.

....

Maybe it was time to see whether I could....

DO THE VOLCANO?

D8

I proposed a new quest to my companions: find, reach, and activate the local Sheikah Tower!

They were all in as I scrambled up the craggy stones and ashfalls, occasionally bursting into flame....

Good friends.... really are wonderful.

Somehow the house became quite the hot spot that night. John and Siara were there, had been there since about the time my friends and I got back from In-N-Out. They gave me a sweet birthday card, too. :3 <3 ^_^ And later Ben and Cami showed up! What kind of party was this?

Spontaneous, I guess.

Alison, Jenenne and Jenny didn’t see me reach the tower; it was getting late and they bowed out before then. I thanked them for the birthday visit, and they departed.

But once I got very close to the structure, I asked Ben if he’d like to see, and he did.

It was nice to find a tower that wasn’t swamped in a bog, covered in briars or surrounded by Guardians. There were just a few Bokoblins in the way on the hill just below, and they were easy enough to dispatch.

The Eldin Region map was.... TREMENDOUSLY INTERESTING. OuO I studied it for quite a long time, noting the places I’d already been, like the Eldin Great Skeleton.

As it turned out, there were a few more GIANT RIBCAGES smattering the sides of the volcano. Perhaps not as complete or grandiose as the Great Skeleton, but.... my gosh, still....

WHAT IS WITH ALL THESE GIANT BONES? o__o;

But then I saw something that truly made my insides shrivel up and die in horror just a little bit....

There was a giant ribcage in a pool of lava.... and just about where the head would have been was.... one of those Bokoblinish skull-dens?

The ones shaped like enormous skulls?? O___O

WAIT, wait.... I mean I’d figured the Bokoblins just liked to carve them that way, but.... then again I’d also seen weird squished mossy ones that looked.... a little more disturbingly organic than that. Or like they fell out of a Studio Ghibli film.

Were they actual skulls?

But I thought of the Eldin Giant Skeleton—THAT one.... that one had not been humanoid, as the skull-dens seemed to be. That one DEFINITELY was probably.... something more like a Dodongo. It had the long tail and everything.

Actually that was the only long tail I’d seen accompanying those ribcages. I mean I’d seen the ribcages everywhere: Lanayru, the desert, distant mountains I’d not yet climbed.... and now here in Eldin.

But maybe the long tails just didn’t survive in any of those other skeletons—and I didn’t see any other bones either, no femurs or pelvises or phalangies how do you spell that—just.... ribcages and vertebrae.

And those skull-dens everywhere.

And a massively boggling thought entered my mind.

Dodongos are native to Eldin; they’re native to the volcanic region. And Dodongos can grow to great size. And judging by the Eldin Great Skeleton, it could have been that giant Dodongos once ranged all over Hyrule.

But....

I remembered one other creature native to Eldin that I had also seen reach enormous sizes—and this creature.... was humanoid—

The Gorons.

The Gorons themselves.

Oh my gosh.

Were those Giant Goron skulls dotting the land all over?

Was there some tempestuous age of Giant Dodongos and Giant Gorons rumbling all over the land in titanic clashes of dominance?

DUDE? D8

Well, Ben and I had fun surveying the landscape from the top of the Eldin Tower. But soon I wanted to move. I tried paragliding down onto where my map said there was a road, but.... a few seconds after leaping off the tower, the wooden club on my back burst into flame with a little woof!

So I warped back onto the tower.

Ben, unfamiliar with the HUD, wanted to see the temperature gauge.

So I jumped off again.

There was something kind of hilarious about sailing quietly and serenely through the air and then woof!—bursting into flame.

I warped back to the tower again.

Ben said even the gauge itself burst into flame!

“Really?” :D I’d never seen that!

So I jumped off again.

Woof! There went the temperature gauge.

I warped back again.

I did this no less than four times, and we laughed every time. XD

Ahhhh.... X-)

Presently I tried jumping the other way—downhill over the face of the volcano—and started making my way toward a shrine I had marked long ago from the heights of Upland Zorana. I’d forgotten all about it. And it was a little tricky to find because my detector was still set to find Decayed Guardians.

Mmm makes me wonder if there are any shrines on the north face of the volcano.... I hadn’t been detecting shrines there either....

I came to the Tah Muhl Shrine, and completed it, and saved.... and went to bed.

Good friends really are wonderful.

And so are good family.

It was a good evening.

Just.... nice.

Nice to sit back and do something simple and fun the night before my doctor would infuse my blood with ketamine. What kind of person would I be after that?

I didn’t know.

Maybe I ought not to panic next time.

I remembered games.

I used to play them all the time, with other people. Lots of other people. And I liked it.

Why hadn’t I even been able to remember Apples to Apples?

It’s a good one.

Maybe next time.... I’ll invite the girls to play Apples to Apples.

And we can make cookies just for good measure.

With a Fine-Toothed Comb

Waking of Thursday, April 6, 2017

With a Fine-Toothed Comb

I spent a little time at the Woodland Stable. This one wasn’t crawling with sets of twins like the other one, and the man behind the counter seemed.... a bit more easy-going as well. There was a friendly dog shepherding over some goats in a pen—we became good buddies <3—er, the dog and I, not the goats and I—and I found a really lovely new labrys to swing around.

I saw a man come riding a grey horse along the road in the direction I’d been going; his name was Zorona and his heart was set on the mysteries of the world! Whether solving them or just reveling in their existence I wasn’t quite sure.

There was another man, with white-blonde hair dangling in his eyes, who hung around the stable. He introduced himself as Molo and it was his ambition to go and loot Hyrule Castle. I did not encourage him in this endeavor as we conversed.

He admitted that every person he’d ever known who had ventured there had never come back.... but he guessed it was because they were all too busy being rich! I don’t doubt there must have been great treasures left behind there.... but so many people I’d met had warned of how dangerous it was.... and I’d seen a few Guardians. Uhuhuh.

Molo, don’t say YOLO, just stay where you are.

One other older gentleman whose name I can’t remember informed me about the surrounding areas near the stable—this was the Eldin region. This was the home of the volcano. To the north was the great forest, but he warned me against straying too deeply into it, something about the Lost Woods at its heart.... And Hyrule Field was.... in another direction near here, south or east I think he said. And there was a third feature he directed me to, I’m sure of it.... maybe it was the volcano itself.

Well, it’s hard to memorize the whole map, as I discovered when I warped back to the Lanayru Tower. That other river I’d thought ran back toward the east off the wetlands was actually the other runoff from the East Reservoir Lake. I suppose it flowed into the wetlands. Or it would have, if not for the big dam wall in the way.

But it was, in essence, what I’d thought it to be: another extensive dead-ended waterway for me to search.

Starting from the tower I began a broad, clockwise trek around the entire delta proper, scouring the islets as I went, but saw no sign of Mei.

I did, however, near the southeastern reaches of my circuit, spy a GUARDIAN “STALKER” AS MY COMPENDIUM CALLED IT, LOOSE AND MOVING THROUGH THE MARSH OH GOSH NO PLEASE NO WHY JUST—

It had six legs, and it was very much alive—oh my gosh was this the one I’d seen loose on the Sahasra Slope, made its way down to the marshes now?

Oh gads....

Off came the Zora Helm, on went the Climber’s Bandana, and I climbed up into the mountains to give it a very wide berth as I continued my circuit of the wetlands. I did stop on a little grassy shelf with a single large tree to see if I could shoot it with arrows and chuck bombs at it, but.... well, I did give it a very wide berth. I couldn’t come close to hitting it with anything. I’m not sure whether this disappointed me or not.

If only I’d had a Korok Leaf.... I could do that bomb-golfing thing I’d seen David do....

I kept to the hills until I came to another little deep-water spot tendriling off the marshes in the southwest. It was near a sad little abandoned homestead ruin, with trees, and a well, and a single Korok spriting around in the grass. There were some rusted weapons here and there.... maybe it had belonged to a soldier. Maybe he’d had a family.

It started to rain.

There was a little raft-boat with a sail down near where the little waterway broke off.

But I didn’t have a Korok Leaf!

I’d never really made room for one in my inventory, but seeing David play.... hhhh I kept seeing more and more reasons to pick one up now. I’ve never yet bothered with the boats I’ve seen but I want to now....!

I felled a tree near the old homestead but got nothing but wood. Go figure.

Well, I couldn’t see anything down the short little waterway, and so moved on. The mountains crumbled away, the land leveled out, and became a smooth sweep off the wetlands.

I think this was where I ran into those mounted bokoblins.

I felt a little bad for their horses.... because you see, in my long searching trek through all the islets and the ruins therein, I’d run into a few more of those skipping lightning-ghost things. They could be tricky customers but I’d taken care of them, and stolen their Lightning Rod weapons. And it was one of these weapons I used to stop the charging bokoblin riders.

The peachy, skewbald steed I hit first seized up, neighing high and loud, and the bokoblin fell off and we had it out on the ground. I brought down the one on the brown horse in roughly the same manner. And then....

Well I got on the peachy one, and he bucked for a bit before calming down, but.... mm, the brown was closer to being a one-color horse, and so I got on that one instead.

He bucked too, but I soothed him and saw—this one had three speed-bursts at a gallop.

Brown only had two.

Well that could be useful....

I let this new horse carry me for a bit. His body was all brown, mane and tail black, with four black socks and a white muzzle. I don’t suppose he was anything fancy, but he was just dandy fine for moving across this flatter part of the land.

I left him at the shore at times, to go in and scout out more islets, or to kill lizalfos or bokoblins. And when I’d come back to him he’d wander a bit before I got on.... but he was a good, patient horse. Even when the lashing rain came back.

I rode the horse the rest of the way around the marshes and the surrounding areas. I even came across Tye and S.... Ssss—uh, Saaalisa? Salisa? I came across Tye and his sweetheart again. And killed their bokoblin assailants once more. I rode and searched and searched and rode until I came all the way back to the Moor Garrison Ruins, near where I’d first met Ledo.

I’d circled the entire marsh, and not seen one lick of the missing Mei.... I had even cleaned out every bokoblin nest I had come to and searched among all the buildings. I’d combed through the ruins, I’d left no stone unturned, no box unexploded.

I had not gone up the long waterway toward the Eastern Reservoir; I’d thought to save that for last as it was so extensive. But....

There was no sign of Mei.

Maybe she really was further down the river.

And this horse....

This chuffing, wandering horse was starting to grow on me just a little bit.

I decided to take him up to the Woodland Stable and have him registered.

I rode him into the marsh; it was quite shallow. But.... huh, to get him across to the north bank....

I consulted my map. The water was pretty deep on the north side of the big island. I might.... dear me, I might have to ride him through the boardwalks—

But then I remembered! Thims Bridge! Northward along the river! I could cross him over there.

And so I took the new horse along the other bank now with me, still keeping an eye out for the missing Mei. We had a nasty run-in with another bokoblin camp—the horse got stuck over a rock on the ground as they closed in around us—I did the best I could with a sword until they knocked me clean off. The horse made a break for it, but I could only turn my attention to the bokoblins and pray he didn’t run too far....

Turned out he didn’t. Also turned out the camp was full of high explosives, and I felt quite lucky none of them went off or was employed during the scuffle.

I bombed them just to clear the area, scooped up the spoils, and the horse and I moved on.

He moved at a nice clip, and the ever lurking Piano picked up on the change of movement and plinked happily along around us, sounding like raindrops in the sunshine. At such a pace it was only a short time before we came to Thims Bridge. But just before we did.... I heard a sound I hadn’t heard before. I slowed the horse, the Piano shied and flitted away, and I scanned the sunlit slope to my left, but could only see a couple of foxes.

And there it was again. High, soft.... kind of whistling.... it sounded like.... howling....

But no I was sure those were foxes. And as I came nearer, there I could see the red of their coats. And they scampered away at my approach.

Were there....

Are there wolves in Hyrule?

(I ain’t gonna lie; I seen a few fanarts with ‘em.)

Horsey and I crossed the bridge, and from there it was just a short trot back to the stable. I spoke to the man at the window, and registered my new steed.

I called him.... Thrice. Once for his three-fold endurance, and once for what I imagined must have been his third life—a life before bokoblins, a life with bokoblins.... and now hopefully third time’s the charmed life with Link.

I’ll take good care of him.

Besides, the name Mudfoot for his black socks seemed too sloggish and slow.