WEST SIDE

Friday, May 10, 2019 ~ 2

WEST SIDE

As I came to the street that led over the castle’s moat, that big natural bridge of earth and stone.... Malice began to drip through the air. And when I came to the big threshold.... my HUD map changed, and I was in the Castle Grounds Proper, and the music turned to the rupturing, tempestuous orchestra.

A mighty gate with two enormous Magnesable doors in a massive masoned frame spanned the width of the bridge. A single Guardian Flyer circled this edifice, sweeping the road below with the beam of its eye.

I just needed to avoid it....

As soon as it passed, I ran to the gate; the Flyer’s scanning did not come near to or brush the actual structure. Even so, I started climbing. Once I’d gotten up on top, I could see there were Guardians everywhere inside.... One Decayed one beyond could see me if I climbed wrong or didn’t keep my head down. I tried to parry its blast, but the distance was too great, my timing was off—

And as I landed back on the ground and then scurried to hide from the circling Flyer again.... “Daruk’s Protection is now ready to roll!” the Goron Champion rumbled in my head.

Convenient.

Hah. Lousy timing, though.

It had been regenerating.

I may need Daruk’s help.

The Decayed ones.... They spot you from such a long way away. But Daruk’s Protection was as good as a Perfect Parry....

I decided I would call on Daruk....

And I did. And it helped.

But there were other Guardians to deal with yet, as I left the Gate and its Flyer and pressed my way inward. Too many for Daruk alone to deal with. I tried parrying again on some of them, and that worked too at times!

I made an effort to follow the road, but was distracted pretty quickly by a tiny, spinning pinwheel up on a balcony.... an Archery Korok.

I climbed up to the wide, battlemented balcony and found it to be backed by a wall of pure Malice, with no eyeball in sight. If there was a way past the dark blockade and into the castle just here, any eyeball guarding it must have been situated on the inside.

The Korok, meanwhile, proved to be RIDICULOUS in its demands—after dispatching all nearby Guardians or hiding from their view, I stood in the optimum spot beside the pinwheel and went through so many arrows trying to land a hit on the Korok’s designated target, which seemed for all the world to be all the way back across town....

But land it I did, eventually, and collected the seed, whereupon I sailed back down to the road.

This was a smaller track than the great broad street that was so large it showed up in the topo, winding its way over the Castle Grounds and up to the Front Door. But it was still wide enough and serviceable; the blasted waste of a hundred years had not robbed the cobblestone of its charm.

I don’t think it’s possible to do that to cobblestone.

The Lesser Road bent to the left, seeming to start a clockwise circuit of the castle, trailing away around the west side through a pox of Malice and eyeballs.... I followed it, but only briefly, and stopped well before reaching any more Malice gates; for near where that first Decayed Guardian had been that had knocked me off the moat bridge gate, there was a doorway on the right side of the track, leading into the castle’s interior....

I went inside, killed some Lizalfos....

This passage looked like it wrapped back around to the right, and I could use it to make my way back to that Malicey balcony from the inside; the HUD seemed to indicate a connection there.... But when I reached the appropriate junction after following the hallway, Malice blocked my way there, too.

The only way left to approach the chamber leading to the Malice Balcony, then, was from the east. The other passage must connect....

I’d find it later.

I went back the only other way to go. Bypassing the door I’d come in, I followed the passage westward and northward until I made my way to the Guards’ Chamber.

More Lizalfos, and one Moblin. I killed them all. I also found another piece from that dark-sheened weapon set, the Royal Guard’s Claymore. Or whatever the big giant swingy one was.

In the Guards’ Chamber, uh muh gush, there were a couple of hidden chests.... One contained a Savage Lynel Shield. I’d take that! The other, dumped in the hollow under a staircase and hidden behind a curtain of dried leafy overgrowth.... was a SHARD OF NAYDRA’S FANG?

WHUUUUTT???

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh....

Okay.

Okay....

But....

Augh, but hadn’t I fired on the poor beasts in too many places already? Visions of shooting the dragons in the mouth spun through my head.... Now that would just be irritating!

Did they drop eyeballs too?

Whatever!

I kept on!

I made my way back to another chamber, another path.... and this one led to a grand circular staircase blocked by Malice.

I killed the eyeball, clearing the way up—this staircase was massive....

Oh but first... I ran back down and checked round the rubble on the other side, the right side—it was piled up thick beneath the ascending circle of stairs—and climbing up over the heaping mounds of it.... I found more treasure up in the cracks near the top. :) Been finding lots of good weapons.... And in this chest.... 3 more Ancient Arrows. I think that’s the third chest here that’s done that for me.

Thank you.

I clambered back down and back around to the left side to ascend the massive spiral staircase in its ponderous clockwise turn....

And of a sudden I was outside. Back in the blustery grey before I knew it.

A Turret took issue at my appearance.

I killed it.

The staircase had come out underneath some kind of huge overhang, some kind of masoned patio roof with a perfectly level ceiling.... The cover from anything overhead for a generous radius was comforting at least, though it still left the lateral directions to deal with.

A very shallow channel-like depression ran through the patio, stretching away in both directions—and then I realized. This was part of the Outside Track—the Lesser Road. There was the Main Road that wound up to the Castle Gate, and then there was this smaller Outside Track that circled all the way around—I could see that now on the 3D overlay in my HUD.

Well, I had started out following it....

I was going to follow the Outside Track again.

As I continued clockwise around the castle, the road took me lower.... I wanted to go higher; I suspected.... that a shrine might be higher, closer to the top, but.... Well, as long as I was here....

I went down lower. Found another entrance to the interior, with Luminous Stone deposits around it. Hmmm.... I wondered if this were one of the ones I had marked on my map in spying the place out from the Elma Knolls. Would I have already walked over it and thus deleted the map marker? Time would tell. Or I guess it wouldn’t.

I went inside....

The name of the place gleamed over my screen, coming into focus....

LOCKUP?

D:

It was a prison....

Or rather a dungeon.

That’s right, I was on the west side, near the Castle Town Prison out on the grounds.... made sense....

What was more, there were Moblins and Lizalfos in here....

Guess they been bad.

....

Man, how awful did a monster have to be for Ganon’s Forces to throw it in the dungeon?

What violent brutes these must have been....

....

The architecture was all hard stone and iron, and a little wood. No fineries for anyone meant to be housed here. After the corner near the entrance, the single corridor continued on a gentle curve, with a row of cells on either side. A very shallow depression ran along the center of the way, sluicing some dismal water drainage away to who knew where.

Malice eyeballs blocked the path, but those were easy enough to dispatch. And I could see what they had been guarding at the first one’s evaporating: there were switches in the central corridor, straddling the sluiceway, that could open the cells on either side, all down the way.

One Silver Moblin was free already, and he and I had it out until I’d laid him out and spoiled his corpse. And then.... I started activating the switches.

Killing them all.... did not feel nice.

They were trapped.

And I an Executioner.

I just wanted to be thorough combing this place....

Well, the Lizalfos were still able to spit at me.

Small consolation.

I killed them all, raiding what spoils and treasures were to be found strewed about their cells. My Master Sword didn’t seem to be running out of energy; it’d been glowing like this for ages, and I’d been killing so many things.

So this was its strength....

Some cells had bombable walls between them, which proved to be the only way to access some of them. And one cell on the left, the castleward side, had a bombable back wall....

I broke through, followed the passageway around; it opened up into a large chamber with some Moblin skulking around.... What was this place....?

But....

No. Not yet.

This wasn’t just some hidden hidey-hole; this was a whole other pathway, and I was not done in the other room yet.

I ran back to the Lockup, slipped around a final dark corner to get to that last, biggest cell, and walked in.

The portcullis slammed shut behind me.

How very OoT.

I’d seen the Stalnox bones. They’d been flopped out in the center of the floor of the big round chamber, bleach-white against the dark stone, and they had stunk of miniboss.

They came to life now.... and I put them down again, with a flurry of arrows to the great, bulbous, black eye, slicing the thing into evil oblivion with my sword at the end, as it popped out and bounced grotesquely around....

There was a treasure chest now, as well as a signpost in the back, engraven into a stone marker. Had these been here all along? The room was quite dark....

The stone read:

- Test of the Royal Guard -

Strike down the giant foe to become

recognized as a knight of the kingdom.

Well....

I opened the chest.

There was that You Get The Thing Music and....

*GASP*

WHAT?

A Hylian Shield?

I mean I had wondered what could be in here, but this was.... I hadn’t expected....

“A shield passed down through the Hyrulean royal family, along with the legend of the hero who wielded it. Its defensive capabilities and durability outshine all other shields.”

Does this.... Is this shield....?

My Master Sword—The Master Sword had been staying so strong. While it had shone. Here in the dark castle. In the Malicey air that seemed to activate its resilience.

Does this shield....

Is this shield unbreakable?

Its strength was 120. Shield Guard Up +30. What does it mean?

Oh my gosh....

Was this shield unbreakable?

I almost didn’t want to test it.

....And after typing a flurry of notes for the log I came back to the game and....

....

Oh, my inventory was full. |D

I dropped the Lizal shield I’d been using, and opened the chest again.

Got the music a second time. Nice.

Now I had the shield....

But heck if I was ever gonna use it.

Just Ends

Waking of Saturday, April 20, 2019

Just Ends

It was late. I sat down and thought to play, but.... the dryer was so noisy....

So I just went treasure hunting instead.

Hit Mekar Island again first. Nothing but a bunch of bad guys. Then why does it feel so....? Why does it feel like there’s something there?

Searched the shrines for chests I may have missed. But I still couldn’t find the Rubber Helm. I did find some other good stuff, but.... eventually I came to a point where I wasn’t willing to chuck out old weapons in exchange anymore.

Boy the Thunder Helm is useful for wandering around electric-path-type Shrines.

Pepp’s and bed.

Good night.

But I Like The Red Rocks

Afternoon of Sunday, January 27, 2019

But I Like The Red Rocks

I started up in my own house in Hateno Village.

I wanted to go see what Hudson was up to. Bolson had wondered about him, said something maybe about trouble.... or had hinted that Hudson couldn’t have gotten into too much of such.... which meant....

Mmmm I roved over my mental map of Akkala, wondering where he could have gone. The land was lush and green all over, but I could not banish the lake from my thoughts....

And if he was at Lake Akkala.... well, dude, freakin’—there were Guardians in there!

I warped to the Wolf Shrine—that shrine low north of Zorana, on the cliffs overlooking the waterfalls and the fairy fountain. Wolves had harrassed me when I first came upon it, and were still often seen nearby. And I ran off the cliff and paraglided toward that jut of land just downtrail from Mija’s little copse, out over Lake Akkala.

Standing all alone over the water....

But of course.... There was nothing else there. Nothing but a Goddess statue....

And I drew nearer to the islandy formation and lo! I saw.... some structures there.... And I saw Hudson! Picking away at a rock! He was okay!

I floated down on the landbridge for a proper approach, and the new name of the place gleamed across my screen: Tarrey Town.

Tarrey Town? Was this where he was expanding? Was he settling here?

I had a nice conversation with Hudson. Gave him ten bundles of wood for materials. I didn’t mind helping him! Aww it was good to see him well! ^_^

But the great hulking boulders on this.... island for lack of a better term.... He needed somebody strong, like a Goron (but with a last name ending in –son, per policy), to come and help him get rid of them.

:(

But I liked the shape of this island. And Akkala’s red rocks were so pretty....

Oh humm hmmm.... This seemed fit to develop into something massive and irrevocable.

....

I reloaded back at my house. Without saving.

Dipped around for a little bit.... Mounted a couple more weapons....

Currently, from left to right around the lower room’s walls, the setup consisted of: the Falcon Bow gifted by Teba, My Trusty Phrenic Bow, (empty); the Lightscale Trident, (empty), the Ceremonial Trident; (empty), the Forest Dweller’s Shield, and the Kite Shield.

I just liked the look of the Rito Shield.... And it was still fresh anyway. So was the Falcon Bow.

I liked Akkala’s beautiful red rocks—how could I move forward with this?

....

Eh, it would autosave occasionally. I just called it a day.

Aquas and LousySpy and the Monster Born Of Darkness

Waking of Saturday, January 26, 2019 ~ 2

Aquas and LousySpy and the Monster Born Of Darkness

This had been a long time coming.

I warped to the Dueling Peaks, took out Knight from the Stable, and rode him to Hateno. Saving a few people along the way, of course.... I swear, that stretch of road....

I made it to Hateno, and found Bolson and his crew. Still sitting out by that wok beside the old empty house.

....

Hateno was one of the first places I had visited; Bolson was an early snake in my life. But now I had traveled the world, or at least the country, and seen just about every habitation there was to see.... just on the vague off chance there might be.... someone else making a similar offer.... somewhere.... Though in my heart as time went on.... I think I had known.... there wouldn’t be.

The Deku Tree’s Navel was homely enough, and Pepp was kind to keep a bed there just for me. But.... I was no Korok....

And these Champions’ weapons....

And Hateno still left a dreary, unloving taste in my mouth.

But....

....

It was time.

I had seen the world, and it was time.

I approached Bolson, and I finished what I had started so long ago, and I bought the house. I shelled out the three thousand rupees. I had seen that amount come and go and come again in my purse, but now.... I was finally putting it where I’d meant to put it eventually.

I bought the house.

And Bolson was.... taken aback! By me, spending so much at such an age! He just found it so.... studly.

Lol Bolson is so gay.

And so the house was mine. As was a weapon mount Bolson and crew had left in there that didn’t get sold. “Consider it a housewarming gift,” Bolson said.

A weapon mount.... Hmmm.... I thought I’d seen those in David’s Hateno House....

After the transaction, it was decided that Hudson, one of Bolson’s men, was going to Akkala. Bolson Construction was expanding.

Well that was sudden. :c

I said goodbye to him and bade him good luck.... and he told me to take care of myself.... Nice guy, Hudson. I always liked him.... when I spoke to him. He was always the most cordial.

He even had his own little.... music.... some gentle musical theme.... as he walked off and away into the fade-out.

Aww. :( I’d miss that guy.

Hahhhh.

....

But for NOW....

....

I WENT TO CHECK OUT MY HAUS.

....

I ran inside and it was so bare. But it was mine.

“This is my house,” I said to David.

The wooden floors gaped dustily up at me as I pounded around in the silence.

“This is my house,” I said again.

“....”

“THIS.... IS MY HOUSE. THIS IS MY HOUSE!” I started singing. XD

And David actually recognized it and rolled his eyes hard.

“WON’T YOU GET OUT OF MY HOUSE? THIS IS.... THIS IS MY.... HOUSE THISISMY HOUSE.... WON’T YOU GET OUT OF MY HOUSE—I’LL GIVE YOU.... A GOOD SPELL, FOR YOU TO USE. SO YOU CAN JUMP ON MY ROOFS AND EVERYTHING LIKE THAT. THIS IS MY HOUSE. PLEASE, GET OUT OF MY HOUSE, IT’S—NOT YOUR HOUSE. I’VE GOT A BIG BEARD! Out of my house.... out.... Ah, don’t stab me....”

....

I don’t think I actually sang the whole thing for/at David but I sure as heck ain’t gonna leave it out of the log.

I ran happily around my new house a few more times, up to the loft and down again, around and around before the initial excitement wore down pretty hard.

Um, the house was all bare. It didn’t even have a door.

I’d finally mounted Mipha’s spear up on the wall, and that was something, but.... where was everything else? David’s house was much fuller than this....

I ran out the doorway to look for Bolson again, getting halfway across the little bridge before stopping and.... hmmmm turning back and grabbing Mipha’s spear again; I didn’t like leaving it alone in a house with no door.

I ran to go find Bolson, but the evening was falling fast and I didn’t find him.

But I did find Kilton.

!

And I remembered.

Now that I’d beaten another Divine Beast....

He should have something new!

Now I could finally see whatever it was that David had seen.... I had guessed and guessed that time, hoping for answers just as much as not. Was it a Hinox Mask? A Guardian Mask? Some kind of Malice-Immunity Potion? But David never said....

I approached the little man in his balloon now....

Kilton was very excited. He’d outdone himself this time. He had created the ultimate monster gear. “I’m actually a bit terrified of myself right now,” he said.

Oh my gosh WHAT IS IT?

He called it.... the dark series.

What?

And he said when I put on this ultimate monster camouflage, I might just become a monster myself. “Have fun being hunted for your organs,” he tells me.

WHAT?

He also said that I might find myself able to move faster at night. “Not sure how that worked out,” he says, “but....” He trailed off.

Oh my gosh....

WHAT IS IT, KILTON?

I clicked through his dialogue until he finally finished his spiel, and I got into his items. Scrolled down.... down.... down....

And....

OH MY GOSH IT WAS A DARK LINK OUTFIT.

Dark Link!

And I studied it a bit more.... “OH MY GOSH THOSE ARE OOT’S BRACERS!” I said to David.

“Who’s Oot?”

“This is OoT’s outfit!”

“Who’s Oot?”

“Ocarina of Time.”

“Oh.”

I knew them by the broad banding over the forearms, and the boot-flaps, and the tunic-lapels, and the shaping of the bandolier and the broadness of the belt.

OoT!

Kilton said he’d designed these with a monster born of shadow in mind.

Uh muh gush....

What an enormous upwelling of nostalgia.

So I started trading him monster bits for his Mon currency. Fortunately I had over 400 Lizalfos Talons and Chuchu Jellies, over 300 Bokoblin Fangs and plenty of Ancient Screws and things.... I made exactly as much as I needed: 3,997 Mon.

And I bought the Dark Tunic for 999 mon.

And I bought the Dark Trousers for 999 mon.

And finally.... I bought the Dark Hood for 1,999 mon.

And I put them all on and....

Oh....

My gosh....

Well that was right creepy.

I was Dark Link!

....

I swear he bore his teeth more.... when he wore this Dark Series....

So I ran to find some townsfolk to scare. But they only jumped and cowered and then spoke to me normally.

And I finally found Bolson! Inside one of the houses in the morning just before he woke up. I just had to wait a minute because he couldn’t be bothered until he got back to the Hylian home.

And shortly, but not shortly enough.... he did. And I spoke to him. And he could see that I was looking at him like I was displeased, or wanted him to keep working on the house—because I did.

So he said he’d finish making it a real home for 5,000 rupees.

You sneakthief!

“But for you, we’ll just start at 100.”

Uh huh, of course you will....

So I spent that morning having him build me things. First, a door, for one hundred rupees.

I forked over the cash, and he called Karson, and in the ensuing blackout I was happily amused to hear that it sounded like the two of them SERIOUSLY got to work! With much manly grunting and huffing and puffing and yelling and guttural shouts all to the rhythm of the sounds of manual construction! XD And when the scenery faded back in, my house had a brand new door. Very nice.

And for a hundred rupees more, a bed up in the loft. And another hundred rupees for some lighting over the main floor. And with each job, the same riotous blackout occurred, Bolson and Karson both yelling and sawing and hammering and yelling some more until the job was done.

That was it for the installation projects. Next I had him add to the mounts on my wall, and he charged me for each one. Two more weapon mounts on the far wall, three shield mounts on the right wall below the loft, and three bow mounts on the left wall. Not in that order, but that’s where they appeared.

With the mounts—and the door—in place, I mounted Mipha’s Spear, and the Ceremonial Trident, along with the stylish Forest Dweller’s Shield, and my trusty, trusty Phrenic Bow. They would be safe and secure in this house. And kept from cumbering me out on the field.

When I was out of mounting options and other interior projects, I had Bolson do exterior work. Even in the rain. Oh I first moved Knight into the roofed stall off the west side of the house and out of the wet. (He and I looked amazing together while I wore the Dark Series.) But I still made Bolson work, despite the cutscenes being robbed of their vibrancy in the silver haze. Plant flowers! Plant trees! (I could hardly spot the wide-angle differences in the downpour.) And finally, A sign with my name on it!

And Bolson and Karson hollered their way through it all, as the last drops finally began to peter out.

The sign stood neatly on its own little pedestal just to the left of the path from the bridge to my door; and it read, I could see after I’d studied it for a moment:

MASTER LINK

                  PRESENTED BY SAKURDA BUILDERS

And when all that had been done, Bolson said “YOU... HOUSING MONSTER!” Or something like it. “You got everything?”

And since I had worked him for all he was worth, he threw in some free furniture for me. (“Karson! Look alive!”) And that.... was that.

And Bolson and Karson left off.

And my house was a home.

And the sidequest Hylian Homeowner flashed across my screen.... Complete.

My gosh, how long had it been?

I didn’t know.

Home complete.... I rode Knight back to Dueling Peaks. Still in my Dark Getup. And the Bokoblins we passed.... leapt out in blatant attacks.

Um.... they didn’t seem very fooled.

I asked David if bad guys did this when he wore the Dark Suit, but he hadn’t bought this set. It was expensive.

Some field research was in order it seemed. I got to Dueling Peaks, boarded Knight, and ran down the road west between the peaks toward the Bokoblin camp. They were all asleep.

So I woke them up with a whistle. Or... did I? They seemed to come to before I could blow. Hmm.

And they all attacked me.

What the heck, Kilton?

One of them hit me with an arrow, and it HURT! D:<

Good gravy that took off a lotta hearts!

Under further attack, I warped away mid-stun to Cotera. Maybe she could upgrade the stuff.

But it was unupgradable.

-_- What in the heck, Kilton?

The ensemble.... didn’t seem to have any good perks.... that I could immediately discern....

But getting another idea I kept it on anyway, and started having the Great Fairy cast her upgrades on my spare Flamebreaker Armor. I had the materials and I just wanted to see something....

I had her upgrade until the kiss. And the little cinematic gave me a clear view of Link’s red-eyed, black-skinned, dark, evil, behooded face.

Oh....

Yeah he definitely bore his teeth more in this outfit....

Sneering. Leering. Narrow-eyed menacing.

My gosh.

Well that was nightmarish.

I reloaded without saving to just before the Great Fairy because I wanted to keep my Smotherwing Butterflies.

Well.

Now what.

....

As long as I was in Kakariko, I went and tried it on the Guardian out back. The Dark Series.

But nope, the Guardian still saw me and got mad. Piano all riled up.

Hm.

I was running out of gas.

....

I warped to the Hateno Ancient Tech Lab and visited Purah. Scared her and Symin with the Dark Suit all right! Symin says—(uh?)—that I can add pictures to my Compendium for a price.... huh, not sure if I knew that before....

Paraglided to.... my house. Scared Bolson on the way.

I have a house now.

And it does look nice.

And it is inviting.

I changed out of my Dark Suit and into my Champion’s tunic, Hylian Hood and Hylian Trousers.

It was 1:10 in the afternoon.

I slept in my very own bed for the first time, until the morning.

Good night.

And at church the next morning, Shelene and I sang. A beautiful song about how by serving the needy, we truly serve Christ, and enrich our own lives as well. And throughout the rest of the cracks between church, women kept coming up to me, and I assume to Shelene as well, to tell me that our singing had moved them to tears.

BLOODY UNWATCHED POT

Evening of Tuesday, September 4, 2018

BLOODY UNWATCHED POT

The Hateno Tower gave me an excellent vantage point. Now I just had to wait. What phase of the moon was it again....?

There it was creeping over the horizon: waning gibous.

I warped back to the Deku Tree’s Navel and sat by the fire. Again. And again. And again.

David remarked that the Koroks must have thought me very weird. Just sitting there unmoving on my haunches for such a long time.

I counted sittings until the full moon night, whereupon I warped to the Muwo Jeem Shrine on the eastern edge of the map. I would definitely get the earliest possible notice looking out over the sea from here....

And up came the big full moon....

It was white. Not red.

Rats!

Okay! I thought to myself, here is what I will do then! I would just go about my business as usual, and then, as each night fell, I would just warp back here to the Muwo Jeem Shrine over the sea and check.

Oh but first I would need to test, yes.... How long would it take me to make it to Washa’s Bluff from the shrine by Tabantha Bridge? I warped there to try it....

The night-speed of the Stealth Suit would help. I touched down on the warp pad at 10:25 pm, and started running. I did not make time to correct the camera angle and so had a bit of a stumble getting off the little hill and down to the ground, but I got the general direction well enough!

Augh, and then I accidentally ran myself out of stamina—Link slumped into a slow, panting jog for a few moments while he recovered—but that was all right, this was only a test run after all. And I wouldn’t make that mistake during the actual Blood Moon....

I dashed and sprinted ahead, giving no satisfaction to the Keese and Stal-creatures hounding my footsteps.

I made it to the pedestal by Kass’ treeshroom—AND THE TERRIBLE ACCORDION RANG DOWN THROUGH MY TEMPLES—and it was five or ten minutes past midnight. I was late.

Hmmmm.... But I had only started at 10:25.... I would be able to see a Blood Moon come up over the sea before that time of night.

Moon usually rose about ten o’clock....

I could make it in an hour and forty minutes....

I could make it to Washa’s Bluff....

I would just go about my business in the meanwhile, yes....

Business as usual.

I was stark raving moon-mad crazy.

I visited Tera and suffered a clothes-alignment conniption inside my menus—I didn’t want to rearrange my closet. But I was short on most materials anyway.

And so I had the BRILLIANT idea to just go back to the beginning per Vizzini, go back to the plateau, and loot EVERYTHING, and take the old east road I had taken before—there were lots of minerals along the way, like between the Dueling Peaks....

Unfortunately the Great Plateau had nothing but a plethora of mushrooms. I killed the Talus anyway. And many Bokoblins. So many Bokoblins. What a killing spree.

When I realized and remembered that the Plateau yielded only the most basic of materials, I paraglided down and headed east through the old ruins anyway, cleaning out the Moblins as I went. I sniffed around every corner, looking everywhere, turning over treasure chest after treasure chest that I just couldn’t fit in my inventory.

I’d meant to explore this place more thoroughly later anyway. Huh, “later”. When exactly was “later”? I’d thought of it back when I first left the plateau. But I’d had to find Impa then, and I hadn’t been strong enough.

I came upon a weapon stamp I had left on my map, for in case I was ever in desperate need of something strong. And at the indicated location, thrust into the earth at the center of a shallow rain-pool.... was a Rusty Halberd.

How little I used to be.

The ruins were a somber place. Inside some of them I could see where I was sure that.... beds.... used to stand. Such simple little dwellings. And I imagined the faithful, loyal guards who must have manned them.

Our poor country.

I continued searching, chasing out a Korok at the top of a weathered flagpole—my gosh there were so many such towers in the field—how many of them hid Koroks? And there turned out to be more Moblins than I had realized between the Plateau and Proxim Bridge as well. Big Yiga Clansmen came out to play sometimes. I killed them too.

Then suddenly I looked up AND THE MOON WAS RED. I GASPED.

IT WASN’T EVEN A FULL MOON NIGHT. WHAT THE HECK, GAME?

CURSE YOU NINTENDOOOOO!

I looked at the clock. Oh wicked fate! It was 10:25. The same as last time. The time I hadn’t made it.

I went to my map—no.... I paused first. I put on clothes for night-speed. Yes. Then to the map. And I warped to the Tabantha Bridge Stable.

This was it....

I had a better time getting off the little hill, hugging tight to the mountainside in my paraglide and jog until I could round the bend enough to make a beeline. I won’t make the stamina mistake, I won’t make the stamina mistake, I won’t make the stamina mistake I MADE THE STAMINA MISTAKE. D8

Link recovered, I was running, I was beelining, hoofing it, there were bad guys, I ran past them, there was no time, the ground began to smoke, the creepy music started, I could see the pedestal glowing far ahead of me, the sky was turning red, I was running, I was RUNNING—

The clock struck midnight.

I didn’t make it

Zelda’s voice warned.

Dang it....

The vision ended.

I ran still.

THE PEDESTAL STILL GLOWED.

I GOT ON.

TOOK ALL MY CLOTHES OFF.

.

. .

.  .  .

.   .   .   .

.     .     .     .     .

.    .    .    .

.   .   .

.  .

.

.

.

.

AND THERE WAS A SHRIIIIINE! 8D

THE MIJAH ROKEE SHRINE BURST OUT OF THE EARTH JUST THERE IN THE LITTLE DEPRESSION ON TOP OF WASHA’S BLUFF!

Mijah Rokee!

What did Mijah Rokee have in store for me! A blessing perhaps? Surely....

It was a Modest Test of Strength.

I put my clothes back on.

And when I came out, the sun was shining so low and warm and beautiful.

And the accordion was gone.

....

It felt a little hollow.

Journey to Toruma

Waking of Friday, August 3, 2018 ~ 4

Journey to Toruma

More Koroks.

More Guardians.

All around the wetlands and up the Sahasra Slope....

I was a little beyond the Pit when I saw the red moon rising....

“Dang it it’s a Blood Moon!” I warped to Satori Mountain and scrambled near enough to its top as fast as I could.

“What?” David asked, confused at my agitation.

But I had already launched off toward Washa’s Bluff.

My paraglide.... could not be fast enough.

“I’m not gonna make it,” I moaned.

“Not gonna make what?” said David. I don’t think he knows about that shrine....

The air began to redden as I was still sailing, approaching the bluff’s edge.

“I’m not gonna make it....”

“What are you trying to do?”

I hit the grass and the strange music began to weep and howl and unholy smoke dripped up into the air—I could see the dais—it was glowing—I was sprinting—the Piano was rumbling—I was almost there—

And the vision started and Zelda’s voice sounded in warning and I came back to the present and the dais went dark and....

I had missed it.

Dang it.

I traveled back to where I had been, shooing up Koroks around a lake southeast of the Pit. I got a few more of them before attempting to swim upriver toward Kakariko Bridge. But the current was stronger than one would think, for just running into a little dead-ended lake like that.

I couldn’t quite make it, even in full Zora Armor....

Just before I ran out of stamina, I warped out of my predicament to the nearby Dueling Peaks Stable, and thought.

I’d already done some shopping to find bits for the Great Fairies to work with.... but I hadn’t seen Hestu in a while. What could he do for me? I had certainly collected a lot of seeds since I’d last seen him.

I warped to Korok Woods to have a visit. But he could offer me no more room for bows. I didn’t want any more shields just now, and another slot for a weapon was still too expensive.

Poop.

I climbed up the Deku Tree’s giant roots and into the Navel; a Korok named Peeks had been waiting for me to show him a pictograph of a Blupee. I did, and he liked that. He liked it to the tune of a hundred rupees, to be precise.... and I liked that.

The day was only just dawning, and so I slept in Pepp’s bed until noon, at which point I decided I had been meandering around long enough.

At noon, I warped to the Sand Seal Rally in the desert.... and started walkin’.

I was going to find Dragon’s Exile.

“Only those who have walked through the desert can truly know its size.” The line from a certain, ah.... Bellena, from Skies of Arcadia, immediately came to mind.

I’d started in a fairly westward direction. The dunes stretched endlessly before me, melting into a blinding ruddybeige haze and rippling in the heat. Fortunately my upgraded Desert Voe Gear was enough to deal with the temperature. I could wander anywhere down here....

The sandscape was not devoid of obstacles, however. There were Lizalfos galore, and more often than not I found myself wearing my mask to keep them at bay. The real trouble came when the Lizalfos began taking up with other breeds of baddies, for I could only wear one mask at a time.

At a giant ribcage I had to stay out of sight up on top of the spine whilst I dropped bombs on a gang of Moblins. But once the Moblins were gone, I had no trouble floating down and looting the place completely. Lizalfos still frozen in sandy-colored camouflage watched me from four feet away, movement betrayed only in their gleaming eyes as I cracked into their treasure chests and carried on my way.

A long jog later, at a tunneled rock formation set low into the sand, I had to hide again while lobbing Bomb Arrows at a small troop of Bokoblins. Some well-placed boomers helped a great deal at the opening volley. But man, that one Black Bokoblin kept wandering off, and took forever to bring down.

But afterward, my mask was enough once again to walk freely among the remaining Lizalfos.

Dusk fell, the sand became a wash of purple-green and grey, and I had to switch from my Headband to my Ruby Circlet.

The desert was truly vast.

In the cool of the night I encountered two men tangling with a couple of Bokoblins, and I dashed in to give them a hand.... but the nighttime came with its own added challenges.

I saw the tiny, crackling, flapping shapes descending fast upon me—“NOT THE KEESE, NOT THE KEESE!”—and immediately ran to put some distance between us. I still had not forgotten that Electric Keese in the rain outside the Honeydell. My GOSH what an ordeal that had been....

From a greater distance I was able to drop the little fiends with my bow, and take care of the Bokoblins. But I rather lost sight of the two men. I ran back toward where I had seen them, near a couple of lonesome palm trees, and I found them standing easily.

They offered me no goodies, though. Seemed I’d run so far away, the game had depopulated them.

Ah well, that was all right. But dang, that Silver Bokoblin could hit.

In the end I could only suffice myself with the said Bokoblin’s weapon—a Trilizal Boomerang with an added attack-bonus like crazy.

At length I came to a long, low shelf in the bedrock, maybe a little taller than I was; the topo lines were gentle here. Toruma Dunes was the name of this place. I jogged along the edge on the upper part, and in the lower portion, out some score yards and burrowing around in a circle in the sand, was a Molduga.

There was something.... peculiar.... about its path....

I didn’t want to get close and I did not want it to sense me down in its own element. But there was something there.... I was sure of it. The Molduga was going round and round within the confines of four small, jutting stone formations, and these formations seemed to share a kind of radial symmetry with each other. Equally distanced.

And I could see on one stone, there was a small, dark shape. I couldn’t quite make out what it was, but....

I needed to get closer.

I dropped onto the lower sands when the beast was farthest away in its tiny circuit. Uhuh, it was terrible approaching it! My steps were slow and light and even, but how long would I be able to flout the Molduga’s superior senses?

In the end I curved wide until I had centered one of the stone formations between the Molduga and me.... and then made a mad dash for it.

I made it onto the stone without incident, and the Molduga continued on its course.

You know I think it may actually have been much smaller than that Molduga I had killed for Malena....

Huh.

But I didn’t wonder about it for long. The object I had seen on the stone stood plain before me now: it was a brazier. And I could see on the stones to my left and right, more braziers waiting to be lit. I assumed the one across from me had one as well—they were situated on the outward-facing edges.

But I couldn’t very well light them up with this brute in the way....

So I drew it up with normal arrows, and blew it up with Bombs.

....That has a nice ring to it. Time to write a song stop rhyming.

With the Molduga dead I was free to light the braziers, and when all four of them were lit, up in the center came the Tho Kayu Shrine.

Excellent.

The Badlands

Waking of Saturday, July 8, 2017 ~ 2

The Badlands

From Gut Check Rock, I began a counterclockwise circumnavigation of Death Mountain. Dinraal looked like he got to some pretty low altitudes.... and if Farosh dropped things when you shot him with arrows.... then surely Dinraal would, too.

I paraglided, I jogged, I climbed—sometimes I would see the DIVINE BEAST crawling in a parallel course higher up the mountain. My gosh it was so big . . . . its feet were on fire . . . . and it had four eyes oh my gosh....

Madly inhaling Rock Octoroks.... Eldin Ostriches.... a few Red Lizalfos.... Ice Arrows took care of them.

And I saw....

Hhhhh.

There was land, over there. North of the volcano, across a huge gulf. Beyond the northern edge of my map.

I’d seen the distant mountaintops. Maybe from all the way back on the Plateau. There were some far, far peaks whereupon if you centered your scope.... the central reticle would remain empty, instead of lighting up red.

You couldn’t place markers there.

I’d always imagined they’d be just part of the grand scenery beyond as soon as I came up against the impassable mountain borders, which surely would be there....

Well.... I suppose the gigantic gulf was border enough. Though it still made it somehow more tantalizing.... Agh there was grass over there; there were hills and slopes and plains and mountains and . . . . hhhhhhh . . . .

It was comforting, and a little heartbreaking, to know and see that there was land over there.

Hahhhh. </3

I tracked Dinraal’s course through the most barren landscape of any I had yet visited. Naked stone and crusted spills of ash. No Koroks.

None.

Only monsters. And ostriches.

And a queer little breed of pigeon I took a pictograph of—apparently it’s no good to shoot it for game; it burns away when killed.

Okay so perhaps the land was not so barren. But the utter lack of Koroks was disconcerting.

The Deplian Badlands.

That’s what this place was called.

I stayed high, working from jutting crag to jutting crag, until I saw something . . . . unexpected, unbelievable, impossible: far away, in the lowest reaches, the farthest skirt of the volcano, right up against the dropoff into the impassable chasm, in a place with grass . . . . a long, broad, crestlike slab of bleachy grey: a skull.

And behind it, vertebra after vertebra, and great bowed ribs spidering into the earth. It was too big. It couldn’t be that big.

I thought of the StalHinox of Satori Mountain.

It couldn’t be that big. It was too big to be allowed!

And on his very occasional slow twining westward passes, Dinraal would snake low through the air above it, a crocodile, and he only the python.

How could it be that big . . . .

A Dodongo, I thought, it had to be a Dodongo, long-dead from some forgotten age, some terrible forgotten age.... And memories of Volvagia, and what would have happened had he not been killed.... And those giant bones I had seen in the dusty desert.... And visions of the volcano erupting endlessly, and lava covering the land, and dread colossal Dodongos reigning in blood and fire . . . .

What a terrible, terrible world.

It turned out the skeleton really was that big—I hiked for what felt like ages, and it seemed barely to come any further into my view. So slowly it crawled by at my passing....

But after a very, very long time, I did manage to get somewhat above it.

I thought again of the StalHinox, and was afraid to go down there. But.... at David’s encouragement....

I paraglided in.

Crag by crag, anyway. And then I was close enough to know: this was called the Eldin Great Skeleton.

IT WAS NOT A STAL-CREATURE. OuO;;

Well that was a relief.

I floated down onto the great mountain-shelf of its head.

There were baddies camped out beneath its spine! Bokoblins, Moblins, Lizalfos.

Well. The high ground was already mine. All I had left to do was appeal to Ja Baij.... I picked a nice angle and chucked my bombs one after another through the gap between two of the skeleton’s ribs. The monsters ran around in an irate fret, trying to find the source of the commotion, but they never failed to either come back toward the center, or run in to try and kick the bombs away.

Either way.... they blowed up real good.

And they left me a few presents! I snagged another Great Fireblade, a few bundles of arrows, and plenty of monster bits.... until these latter treasures began rolling away toward the skeleton’s tail with a sudden gust of wind.

David directed my attention upward: Dinraal was making another pass! I ran but could not catch his head. And so I fired an arrow at the only place I could—his underbelly.

I still had Ice Arrows equipped—sorry, Dinraal!

And a scale streaked glowing toward the earth like a falling star.

“What?” said David, but I didn’t answer him; I just collected the scale.

Cool. X-)

I had quite a time exploring the entire giant skeleton, let me tell you. I climbed back up the tail and jumped from vertebra to vertebra—each singular bone took a few jogging strides to cross! And I crept up the neck beneath the huge armored skull—almost fell all the way through to the front but climbed back up and went backward again.

How could it be this big.

But after a time I moved on, and continued my counterclockwise traversal of the mountain.

And I saw something else. Something that seized my gut and just about made my heart stop—a White-Maned Lynel.

That’s what my compendium called it. I snapped its pictograph just as it threw a startled question-mark glance in my direction—and then I ducked back down behind the rock I was on.

Oh my gosh.... 8C

Its body was black and white. Striped. Like a zebra!?

So that was what was up with that thumbnail I kept decidedly ignoring in my DeviantArt messages.... there really were zebra-Lynels....

Yeah it was time to get high again. Oh that came out so wrong. It was time to get to high ground! I climbed up the backside of a large jutting rock, away from the Lynel’s view, until I was back amid the ashy crags of the mountain’s side.

And I continued round the mountain.

From my high road I saw Dinraal make another low pass over the farthest skirts of the mountain—this time over the barren piece of earth the White Lynel haunted. Anywhere else I might have sailed in to try for another scale or shard, but here?

Hah, NOPE! C8