The Princess is a Nerd

Waking of Monday, March 18, 2019

The Princess is a Nerd

Looking for Shrines.

Bottom of Lake Totori. Nope. Just a lot of swimming and Stamina games. And dripping through the air shafts.

The Devil’s Own Highway, via Moza’s.... enchanting abode. Nope. Just some Koroks and coyotes.

Purifier Lake. Killed the Hinox and the Lynel. Rusty Shield finally gave out in a blaze of glory.

Nope.

The eastern skirts of the volcano. Found some ruins, the Shadow Hamlet Ruins.... But nope.

The northeastern shore of the mainland. Nope.

There was....

....

I needed a Korok Leaf....

Warped to the forest and picked one off the ground. Finally spoke to one Kula the Korok, who wanted to see an Ice Rod. Heh, another Nebb....

I was busy.

Boating around Lomei Labyrinth Island. Nope.

Almost drowned when the wind blew away my boat after I swam to the border. But there was ground to stand on at the island.

No shrines.... where are there more shrines....

Tried a bit around the northeastern Central Plains. Nope.

The northern skirts of the Gerudo Highlands, as far west as I could go. Nope.

The eastern edge of that bowl of jungle-forest on the way to the Spring of Courage. Nope.

Hateno.

....Cooked more meals. That Lynel was brutal.

Bed.

Sleep.

Good night.

Just kidding.

Came back late when everyone else had gone toward bed. To bed.

Checked out Strock Lake. Very strange winds. Lots of treasure, a few Koroks, butt-tons of Lizalfos and a heckton of trouble. But no shrines. Nope.

Checked out the western edges of the Central Plains. Nope.

Hem and haw. Shilly Shally.

....

I shall.

I warped to the shrine near Serenne. And.... I moved toward the memory.

Uh.

There was a memory near there, just to the south and east a bit. A memory by a tree on a grassy hill, with the back side of the Castle in the distance. I’d seen it before. Even stood in it. Why did I never mention it before? How disgusted I am with myself as a journaler....

Maybe it was when I was looking for Mei. That run all the way across the Elma Knolls....

I did not rely too heavily on my map, but decided to go by sight in the midst of the thunderstorm. Stalgoons came out to waylay me, but I am a quick-change artist.

The first batch I left behind.

The second batch popped out right before I could get to the tree. Ugh. I did not want to wear down my weapons dealing with them, but I didn’t want to view the memory with them hanging around either. They all three told me their life stories for like three or four hours....

“Dawn take you all and be stone to you,” I urged them under my breath.

And at five in the morning.... they did.

The Memory....

Zelda and I sat near the tree on a beautiful sunny day, Zelda taking pictographs of all the flowers she could find. We were just sitting. The flowers were so lovely....

“The flowers of Hyrule aren’t just beautiful,” she says, “But they are also incredibly useful.” She expounded on their various properties and their uses as herbs and ingredients.

And then.... she stopped, seeming to slow down and breathe as her eyes softened.

“This one here...”

And then I saw it.

“This one is called the silent princess. It’s a rare, endangered species. Despite all our efforts, we’re not yet able to grow them domestically.”

She stroked it so lovingly. I felt suddenly guilty for picking every single one I could get my mitts on....

“The princess thrives out here, in the wild.”

Her eyes still looked at it.... though they looked at a thousand things more that I couldn’t see.

Does she now.

“The best we can hope is that it continues to grow strongly out here in the wild.”

I looked over her shoulder at the flower.... before with an excited little yelp the princess lunged forward on her hands and knees like a child.

“Oh I can’t believe I’ve caught one! Look at this!” She turned back to me with her hands cupped in front of her. “Ta-da!” She opened them.

A green frog chirruped and puffed and wriggled in her palms.

“They say that ingesting this specimen can actually enhance certain attributes!” Her eyes became more focused than I’d ever seen them before; he speech quickened; it all seemed to come flooding out of her.

Oh . . . I breathed out a single, hard little sigh in the shape of a smile.

I could see now.

There you are, I thought.

The princess.... was a nerd.

“And we wouldn’t be in a controlled environment out here, but with your excellent physical condition,” she kept coming closer, “you would make the perfect candidate to test this theory!”

And closer!

“Go on!” she urged excitedly, thrusting the frog into my face as it hopped up from her palms!

“Taste it!”

I backed up.... gasping in.... hesitation for I dare not say disgust here why oh gosh she’s the princess....

Oh my gosh.... the princess.... is a NERD. X-)

After coming back to myself I took a portrait. Several portraits. Then culled. Narrowed. Until I was satisfied.

In flicking through my albums, I saw that the pictograph of Windblight Ganon.... it had four.... protrutions out the back, like Revali’s four braids.... and I felt.... sick....

Enough.

HATENO.

HOUSE.

BED.

It was 11:something in the morning. Slept ‘til noon.

Deep Smit

Waking of Saturday, October 27, 2018 ~ 2

Deep Smit

I didn’t have the topo, but I could see the icon indicating Lurelin Village’s location. It was directly on the other side of a sizeable mountain from where I was.

Instead of following the winding beach all the way back, I decided to take a little climb, straight up and over....

From the beach and sea level, the mountain looked rather unremarkable, but as I climbed I discovered a good number of little dells and hidden hollows, and a heckton of Blue Nightshade flowers! Cool.

And at the tippy top was a Korok. Of course.

As long as I was at the crest I decided to spend a moment taking in the view. And looking down the tumbles of another side of the mountain, I could see.... Why that’s a heart-shaped pond! One single pond—not broken down the center like that one above Hateno Village. This heart was whole.

And there were people down there....

A Hylian man and a Gerudo stood on opposing shores of the little pond. Furtively staring at one another. I spoke to them both.

Wabbin was the man’s name. And he was in some seriously deep smit. That Gerudo across the way was gorgeous. But he couldn’t work up the nerve to just go over there and talk to her....

The Gerudo, Perda, on the other hand, was feeling a bit unsure. While she was indeed out seeking her true love, and this did seem to be a place of providence for the matter, she didn’t quite know what to make of the creeper who kept staring at her from across the way....

I played a lovely game of go-between. XD

Wabbin wanted to offer her a token of his feelings—a flower. Only he didn’t have any flowers. And he begged me to find him some Blue Nightshades.

Well! As it turned out I’d just run into a huge stash of those! Not that my pockets weren’t already full of them. I handed one over.

But Wabbin was too petrified to offer the gift himself. So he asked me if I would do it.

Heh, sure thing, buddy. X-)

I took the flower to Perda, and let her know how that guy over there was totally digging on her, and well.... that put her in deep smit, too.

A few more messaging runs back and forth, and the most adorable cutscene ensued, with Wabbin and Perda finally on the same side of the pond together, Perda still holding the flower! ^_^ Awww, that was cute. Don’t see items as props too often.

And as the sun rose on the high meadow with its pond in the seaside mountain.... I was the last one to fall into deep deep smit. Because I saw just how many Hearty Radishes there were growing around here! Sweet! 8D

Those things is good eatin’!

Another Hat!

Waking of Saturday, August 4, 2018 ~ 2

Another Hat!

I sand-sealed back to Gerudo Town and found Barta again. As we visited in the barracks, she confided to me that when I’d shown up out there in the desert, she thought the voe of her dreams had appeared.

....Heh.

I also spoke to Liana, and she was so happy I’d found Barta, she said, “Here, take this,” and handed me a hundred rupees, “Go buy yourself something nice at the market.”

Aww, thanks, Liana. ^_^

I said hi to Captain Teake on my way into the palace, where I saw that young Chief Riju had a certain red exclamation mark above her head.... Had I really already....?

I spoke to her.

“You’ve brought back the smiles to my people,” she said, “I know that you more than anyone else will be able to use this helm to its full potential.”

Or some.... such.... words.... Ah, that wonderful little ITEM GET song played, and I found myself in brand new possession of the Thunder Helm.

I was now LIGHTNING PROOF.

SWEET.

Would it make the same bubble-effect in a large radius around me? Would it glow?

I almost tried it on right then and there, but I remembered myself, and where I was.... I would have to leave town first.

I took my leave of the palace and jogged outside to put it on and have a look at myself!

....

There was no glowing or magical effect. Which wasn’t completely unexpected. I was sure it would still protect me well enough....

It did make me look just as buggy-eyed as it had done the Chief, but it was otherwise very shiny and ornate!

Cool. ^_^

Agh but I did not want to stop—I warped to Dueling Peaks to check with Hino just one more time.

But Hino wasn’t there.

I blinked and turned to gather Swift Violets from around the waterfall behind the shrine for a bit.... and after I had plucked as many as I could, then Hino made an appearance.

But there was no Blood Moon tonight.

Hhhhh.

It was in the three o’clock hour in the afternoon. A bit later for myself on the couch.

....

I just went to bed, and slept until morning.

Good night.

The Silent Treatment

Waking of Friday, April 14, 2017

The Silent Treatment

It was time for a new plan.

I had seen Sheikah Towers in close range of two of the places I could comfortably haunt. One was up on a hill behind the Woodland Stable, above the river that bent toward the castle. The other was northward beyond the hills of Upland Zorana, in what had to be Akkala.

I would first climb and activate the tower behind the stable, and thereby attain a map of the area. And if, from whatever the map could tell me, the river steered clear enough away from the castle, then I would follow it, for Mei. But it if ran too close to Calamity Ganon, then I would head to Akkala, and Mei would have to wait.

Because I wouldn’t be able to help anybody if I got myself killed along the way.

I needed this Robbie, I needed more shrines....

I needed to get stronger.

Why was I so set on finding the missing Mei?

Maybe it was just that a missing person seemed so much more desperate than getting rid of a Hinox, or harvesting luminous stones.... Maybe it was just poor Fronk. And poor Fronk’s children, Tumbo and Keye.

Where was their wife and mother?

I had to make one last effort for now, but first I would take a couple of pit stops along the way to the Woodland Stable....

Was I visiting with the Prince again when I left? Whom did I give a heart attack to when I teleported away from Zora’s Domain....?

My first stop was Cotera’s Forest, above Kakariko Village. There were living Silent Princess flowers in there, and perhaps Tye and Sorelia—that was her name—would react better to a pictograph of one of them.

I found the flower, snapped its image, and was on my way.

The fairies had still not returned to those woods.

Did I destroy their population when I caught so many there before....?

I wonder....

My next stop was the shrine near where I first met Ledo, in the river by the wetlands. I could reach Tye and Sorelia’s camp easily enough from there.

I had it out with some stray lizalfos, swam to the shore, killed a mounted bokoblin, briefly mounted his black appaloosa—but, not wanting to get attached to it, I got off again pretty quick—and jogged to Tye and Sorelia’s camp.

Those two, I swear, I can’t leave them alone for one minute.

Tye was trading sword strokes with one black—er, blue.... blue bokoblin, while the other blue bokoblin was chasing Sorelia around the field. Blasted base animals....

I gave the Hylians a hand in finishing off the monsters, and then the three of us reconvened at their little shelter.

This was it, surely. I would show them the pictograph of the flower, and then they would want to know where it was, and I would tell them somehow, so they could go make their vows.... but not before I took a pictograph of them to take back to Kapson in Zora’s Domain, and he could marry them!

But I could not show them my pictograph.

There was no option. I couldn’t tell them about it.

I tried tuning my Sheikah Slate’s sensor to detect Silent Princess flowers. Maybe they would hear and remark on the beeping....

They didn’t.

What did I need to do to draw their attention to it?

I tried again dropping an actual specimen of Silent Princess at their feet, on the ground before their eyes, but they said nothing.

WHAT MORE DID THEY WANT?

It was a chore picking that thing back up, let me tell you, trying to maneuver to a place where the A button would let me collect an item rather than speak to a person.

Tye.... you’re killin’ me, man, you gotta work with me here, come on....

I snapped their pictograph where they sat anyway. For Kapson. I don’t know why.

It was a good pictograph.

Mind the Daisies

Waking of Saturday, March 25, 2017 ~ 4

Mind the Daisies

The last hump of grassy hill to the north bank of the river was not as bare as my map had made it out to be—a rusted Guardian slumbered there. I gave it a wide berth.

After trying and failing to sneak up on some deer through the rain, at last, at last, there was the Shrine.

I paraglided down to it, and no sooner had I run a few paces across the islet—Floret Sandbar—than an irate woman’s voice scolded me something awful.

I was ruining her flowers.

The game blacked out and put me where she was, on the south side of the island. She told me to watch my step for the love of all things holy.

Ah, I saw, it was like a corn maze. I just had to follow the bare grass winding round like a crop-circle.... which turned out to be easier said than done. Er, if you wanted to reach the handy items in all the dead-ends, that is.

And a fat blue chu popped out of the ground, and I found out quickly that I couldn’t swing my sword at it; the strokes were too broad. I needed a spear for straight thrusting.

This was more involved than I’d anticipated!

The woman brought me back to the start every time I messed up, and it was about four or five times! But eventually I made it to the shrine, and received a fourth Spirit Orb from the monk inside.

I’ve been calling them shamans, but.... when David started a game I noticed and remembered the term monk.

However, when I exited the shrine I wasn’t quite sure how I was supposed to wind myself back out through the flowerbeds. But I didn’t bother. Instead, I warped to the mountaintop where Vah Ruta now resided.

I’d made a lot of friends in Zora’s Domain.... and I’d assured most of them I’d lend them a hand.

It was time to deliver.